It's A Rough Job..."The Hitman's Bodyguard"

The Hitman's Bodyguard (2017)

Rated R

Starring Ryan Reynolds, Samuel L. Jackson, Salma Hayek, Elodie Yung, Gary Oldman,

Directed by Patrick Hughes

The Story:

Michael Bryce (Reynolds) used to be the best Triple A rated bodyguard in the business. After a disaster he couldn't have seen coming, he's now striving to keep himself employed and working to get back to the top. Hired to escort international assassin Darius Kincaid (Jackson) to testify in court to put a war criminal (Oldman) behind bars, the two have to survive countless assassination attempts and each other if they hope to make it out of the situation alive.

If you saw the trailer and thought it looked like a silly, fun action flick, well you were right.

Ryan Reynolds is back to doing his usual routine of playing himself/Van Wilder/Wade Wilson.

It's worked for his entire career in most movies, so why stop now?

Paired with Samuel L. Jackson, the two get to enjoy the camaraderie that comes in the usual buddy comedy/mismatched dynamic duo genre and all the trappings and cliches that entails.

I happen to looooove that genre, so I'm a fan.

Fun film that with a few tweaks along the way could have been even better than it was.

Your mileage of course can vary.

Final Grade: B-

The Right Man For The Job..."Darkest Hour"

Darkest Hour (2017)

Rated PG-13

Starring Gary Oldman, Kristin Scott Thomas, Ben Mendelsohn, Lily James, Ronald Pickup, Stephen Dillane,

Directed by Joe Wright

The Story:

As the Nazis roll through Europe, Great Britain is facing an internal crisis of their own as Chamberlain (Pickup) resigns as Prime Minister and recommends Winston Churchill (Oldman) instead. However while the majority seem to want to forge a peace with Germany, Churchill seems determined that England draw a line in the sand, and fight!

It's rare to have the 2 hour biographical drama that you wish would have kept going, or might get a sequel, but then, Winston Churchill is the rare subject that likely deserves it.

Oldman disappears into the role and carries the picture that pretty much is a short snapshot of him getting selected as Prime Minister and the first weeks in office.

But that's because quite a bit of events kept churning up in that window of opportunity.

The movie blazes through this time period, while also giving a brief look at his life at home with his wife (Thomas) as well as Churchill breaking in a new secretary (James).

Having read and watched other Churchill biographies, this one hits most of the high points of that crucial time period and thanks to the spectacular work of Oldman, leaves you wanting more.

Definitely worth a look.

Final Grade: B+

The Man Who Fell To Earth..."The Space Between Us"

The Space Between Us (2017)

Rated PG-13

Starring Asa Butterfield, Gary Oldman, Carla Gugino, Britt Robertson,

Directed by Peter Chelsom

The Story:

Gardner (Butterfield) was the first human born on Mars. His mom died during childbirth, and there was no clue who his father was. Inquisitive, the astronauts that have been at the Mars facility have helped raise him, and he is very smart and inquisitive, but a tad socially awkward. Thanks to technology, he has been in contact with one girl, Tulsa (Robertson) on Earth. What Gardner wants more than anything is to come home to Earth and find his dad, meet Tulsa, and feel what it's like to be human. Unfortunately, since he was born in space, his body and organs are not used to Earth's gravity, and the trip very well may kill him.

Not your typical coming of age storyline, but one that I found enjoyable to watch, cliches and all.

Gardner has pretty much learned anything and everything in life from NASA engineers and technology at his disposal, but he has to still learn what it's like to be human.

He has found a kindred spirit in Tulsa, who longs for a life that is anything but the life she currently lives.

Of course how can a boy who cannot live on Earth come home, find his father, find true love and survive all in the span of 2 hours?

While not perfect, for the most part the movie works just fine from start to finish.

The cast does a fine job, and it's always a pleasure to see Oldman and Gugino in just about any movie.

The ending really works for the film and ties up the narrative nicely

Final Grade: B-

This Movie Seems Vaguely Familiar... "Criminal"

Criminal (2016)

Rated R

Starring Kevin Costner, Ryan Reynolds, Gary Oldman, Tommy Lee Jones, Jordi Molla, Gal Gadot,

Directed by Ariel Vroman

The Story:

CIA Operative Bill Pope (Reynolds) is trying to stop "The Dutchman" (Molla) from his diabolical plot to do something bad. But then he winds up dead. Or at least, mostly dead. So his mind, memories and abilities are transferred into death row inmate Jerico Stewart (Costner) for him to complete the mission. Except, he doesn't really want to.

Hilarity ensues.

Okay, maybe not so much that last part, but lots of explosions, death and swearing abound during the next 2 hours.

Remember earlier this year, I reviewed a little movie called Self/Less ?

Of course you don't, I barely remember it either.

But what I do remember is that a millionaire who didn't want to die transferred his memory into the younger body of... wait for it.....

 Ryan Reynolds!

Nope, you can't make this stuff up.

So it's almost like an indirect sequel.

:)

However, what's really criminal is that this amount of star power is unleashed in such a...

bland ? mediocre ? meh ?

type of action film.

Costner Christian Bales grunts his way through the movie. I guess it shows how angry he is?

Either way, the movie sort of wears you down while it chugs along to the inevitable showdown at the end.

However, it's everything that the film lacks with tension, drama and importance that just gives us a bland thriller, through no real fault of any of the actors.

Final Grade: C...maybe even a C+

Pure Monkey Business..."Dawn of the Planet of the Apes"

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014)

PG-13

Starring Andy Serkis, Jason Clarke, Gary Oldman, Keri Russell,

Directed by Matt Reeves

The Story:

Ten years after the last movie, which quite frankly, I barely remembered what happened, they recap that a simian virus swept through the globe and killed lots of people. As society attempts to rebuild, Caesar (Serkis) leads his band of merry apes in the forests outside of San Francisco as they live pretty peacefully. However, when the local population enters the area hoping to get power from the dam, a tenuous peace between the apes and people is about to devolve into all out war.

At least, by the next movie.

This movie was fine, and was watchable.

Just not a whole lot really happens until the final act, and it's like they were simply setting this movie up as the bridge to Conquest of the Planet of the Apes, or whatever it will be called.

The fragile peace between apes and mankind is of course shattered... but not by who you expect!

Gary Oldman shows up and collects a paycheck!

Seriously.

He's in the movie for about 5-7 minutes total.

Anyone could have played that part. I had 20 minutes free in 2013 or 2014, I could have done that.

:)

The visuals are amazing, as usual.

I'm sure I'll be around to watch the sequel.

And like this one, I'll probably have forgotten what happened previously.

:D

Final Grade: C / C+

You Look Very Familiar... "RoboCop"

RoboCop (2014)

Rated PG-13 for violence and language

Starring Joel Kinnaman, Gary Oldman, Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson,

Directed by Jose Padilha

The Story:

In the future, OmniCorp has been sending their cyborg troops overseas as peacekeeping soldiers ensuring real people aren't dying anymore.  Only America is refusing to allow these tin men to patrol the streets, and with pressure on politicians by OmniCorp president Sellars (Keaton) and crusading journalist Pat Novak (Jackson) are lobbying to get a RoboCop trial program off the ground.  The missing ingredient: the human factor.  When they receive the gift of a cop that was targeted for assassination (Kinnaman), they hardwire him into the RoboCop program.

This is not your father's RoboCop.

Or mine, for that matter.

The original, satirical take on America in the 80s is still a science fiction classic, however, my fears, as I voiced in my review last year of the original RoboCop (1987), were thankfully unfounded.

While many of names remain the same, there are subtle, and less subtle shifts in tone and behavior to the original.

Whereas Total Recall tried to change the story completely, the over-reliance of the original ended up casting a shadow that the remake could not crawl out from under.

RoboCop takes the least amount of the original and transplants it, without the satiric tone, into a possible future America that could likely exist.

Why wouldn't we want to send robotic soldiers to fight wars and save hundreds/thousands of human lives?

You would think it would be a no-brainer, but politicians want human capability for discernment to be included.

Kinnaman brings life to the suit, literally if not figuratively.  Not familiar with his work, the big names all float around as secondary figures.

At the end of the day though, if I am only going to watch another RoboCop with my kids (assuming they want to watch it again...), it would end up being this version.

Simply because the tone and violence is dialed waaaaay back this go round.

The revamped RoboCop is a perfectly serviceable science fiction/action flick for a new generation.

Final Grade: B-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: It actually wasn't too bad.  I don't think I'll rush out to own it, but I could watch it on cable in the future.

Is The Movie Boring, Or Am I Suffering From "Paranoia" ?

Paranoia (2013)
Rated PG-13  for language

Starring Liam Hemsworth, Gary Oldman, Harrison Ford, Amber Heard

Directed by Robert Luketic

The Story:

Adam (Hemsworth) is a cocky know-it-all at a technology firm run by Nicholas Wyatt (Oldman).  When he gets fired, he takes his company card and his team out on the town for one last hurrah.  Wyatt is irritated and drags Adam back in.  He's going to set him up to go undercover for his rival, Jock Goddard (Ford) and steal secrets.  What a tangled web we're weaving...

Another "should have been better..." film.

You've got Oldman and Ford, but the two barely spend any screen time together.

The two do everything they can to elevate the proceedings whenever they are onscreen, but really, it's not a lot to keep you engrossed.

The sinister-ness is downplayed and mostly the movie peddles along at a clip just around boredom.

That, and Ford should leave his hair alone, he looks terrible with that short-cropped stubble.


If you want a good twist and turn movie, watch The Firm instead.


Final Grade: C-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: That's a neither to both.

There Were Holes In Shia LaBeouf? Actually...Yes! "Lawless"

Lawless (2012)
Rated R for Language and violence

Starring Shia LaBeouf, Tom Hardy, Jason Clarke, Guy Pearce, Gary Oldman
Directed by John Hillcoat


I'm actually pretty pleased that I was able to use a Pysch reference for today's title.

From there, it's all downhill folks!

:)

The Story:

The Bondurant Boys: Jack (LaBeouf), Forrest (Hardy) and Howard (Clarke) are making a living in depression/prohibition era Virginia by making and selling moonshine.  Ah, but corruption creeps in with a District Attorney and his deputy Charlie Rakes (Pearce) who collect from all the bootleggers.  The boys refuse, and this sets off an escalating war as Rakes tears the countryside apart trying to bring down the thorn in his side.

Sound exciting?

It should have been.

But I found myself pushing the fast forward button on a lot of this because it was just dragging...and dragging.

For almost 2 hours.

The actors do a fine, if unspectacularly convincing me that their story is an important one.

It was mostly a series of one Bondurant doing something stupid, then working together to fix that problem.

Wash. Rinse. Repeat.

I Can't Believe They Shot Me!

Even Guy Pearce who normally chews up the screen as the malicious bad guy just couldn't pull me in.

Heck, Gary Oldman couldn't even do much, with likely the second most charismatic part in the movie, but very limited screen time.

Perhaps Oldman and Hardy were just happy to be collecting their Bat-checks?

Your mileage may vary, but I was bored.

The movie itself looked great though, so there's that.

:)

Final Grade: C-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Not even if it was offered as a bribe...

I Don't Remember "The Fifth Element" on the Periodic Table...

Hold on!

The Story:

The Fifth Element is the ultimate weapon against evil.  It saves Earth once, but it's getting too dangerous, and must leave the planet for safety.  Don't fear though, it will return to save the day in the future.

Welcome to the future!  The Fifth Element is on its way to save the day when tragedy strikes.  Scientists however are able to recreate the element in the form of LeeLoo (Milla Jovovich).  She escapes to try and complete her mission and is rescued by Korben Dallas (Bruce Willis) former military, now cab driver.    It's up to Dallas to help LeeLoo save the planet from Evil, and evil's # 1 henchman, Mr. Zorg (Gary Oldman).  With a little luck from the clergy (Ian Holm)...it just might work!

I've got nothing but love for this film.

They had fun, but take the premise seriously...at least seriously enough.  : )  The tongue is never too far from the cheek as the situation dictates.

This is another Luc Besson masterpiece that he did double-duty on this time as both the writer and the director.

Gary Oldman runs around the movie as the scenery chewing bad guy, and he's just having a blast.

Bruce Willis plays to his strengths, the wisecracking hero who saves the day, and that's perfect for this film.

In fact, all of the supporting cast is enjoyable throughout the movie.  I suppose I should give special mention of course to Chris Tucker.

This was my first exposure to his work, and I would say that the first time I saw this film, I absolutely hated him.

Talk about annoying!

Then the years passed, and the Rush Hour series came along. 

Then I've come back to this film every once in awhile in the 16 years since it came out...

Does it trouble anyone else that all of these movies are getting up there in how old they are, or is it just me??!!

: )

Anyway, Tucker's annoying Ruby Rhod grew on me, and now I look forward to seeing him having a ball onscreen.

Naturally, you also can't overlook Jovovich's launch to movie stardom from this film.  She is a force of nature, and it has translated successfully to the Resident Evil franchise as well.

Movies like this are a perfect example of why I love movies.  It's a B movie that tries to entertain and have fun with itself, and it translates well to the audience.

I would imagine that many Sci-Fi purists might hate this film, but for this guy?

Works like a charm.

Final Grade: B+

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I do own it, and again, it sees a spin every 3-4 years or so.

The Bane of My Existence..."The Dark Knight Rises"

The trilogy concludes...

The Story:

8 years have passed since Batman went into seclusion.  The streets of Gotham are safe, thanks to the Dent Act.  But when trouble rolls into town in the form of sadistic mercenary Bane, all bets are off, and Bruce Wayne decides to dust off the cowl and go back into action as...

Batman!

Has it been 8 years?

I honestly don't know.

In fact, aside from knowing that I saw the 2nd film, I really don't remember much about it.

Perhaps I was still too depressed that Heath Ledger killed himself, but I really don't remember much about that film.  Other than everyone loving it.

I'm not even sure if I own it, I'll have to check my DVD case.

But anyway, back to the film...

So the cast grows with the arrival of Catwoman (Anne Hathaway) and a cop (Joseph Gordon-Levitt...again...) who both figure strongly in Batman (Christian Bale) and Commissioner Gordon's (Gary Oldman) fight to save Gotham from Bane (Tom Hardy, unrecognizable under the mask).

And much like props to Karl Urban for his willingness to be masked the whole film for Dredd, kudos to Hardy for taking a role that hides his face and muffles his voice for 98% of his entire screen time.


I was pleased with the Catwoman performance this go-round.  Never saw Pfeiffer's version, but this is a huge leap in the right direction after Berry's debacle from years back.


In fact, as an action film, this was actually a pretty good movie.

That said...

By this point in time, with the arrival of The Avengers, and Marvel stepping up their movie business with hit after hit, my kids had absolutely no desire to even watch this one.

So DC, you better step up your game if you have any chance of putting butts in the seats, at least with my family.


: )

I see how they set up for the eventual sequel/franchise reboot or whatever...


Meh.  I can handle another Bruce Wayne actor... not thrilled with what they have seemingly decided on though.


Final Grade: B

Would I Own It: I'll probably pick up a copy eventually on the cheap, but no big hurry. 

Marvel > DC.

: )

Hail to the King, Baby! "Guns, Girls and Gambling!"

It's being released on February 28th... in Russia...

That can't be a good sign!


The Story:

John Smith (Christian Slater) is at an Indian Casino, tries his hand at Elvis Impersonation against Gay Elvis (Chris Kattan), Little Person Elvis (Tony Cox), Asian Elvis and The King (Gary Oldman).  The boys all play poker that night, and when Smith wakes up in the morning, an ancient mask has been stolen from the casino, and everyone, and I mean EVERYONE wants it back.  Smith claims he doesn't have it, but that's not going to stop an assorted who's who of crazies from trying to find him, and kill him, to get it back.

You know, sometimes you never know what to expect in a movie like this.  The title alone warns you, it's strictly Grade B (or Z, your call) for script, title, etc. etc.

Then the movie starts, and you realize that it's a venture that doesn't take itself anymore seriously than the title did, and this film doesn't disappoint.

Instead, you smile and shake your head in amusement at the story they are pulling off in front of you, kick back, check your brain at the door, and try and have a good time.

You do that, this film won't disappoint.

Try and understand why master thespian Gary Oldman is in this film playing Elvis, and you will give yourself a migraine!

As for me, I enjoyed it.

Available to stream instantly on Netflix as of this writing.


Final Grade:  B

Would I Want to Own It:  Amazingly enough, I could watch this one again when I'm in the mood for some Budget Movie Awesomeness!