Shoot Me Now..."American Assassin"

American Assassin (2017)

Rated R

Starring Dylan O'Brien, Michael Keaton, Sanaa Lathan

Directed by Michael Cuesta

The Story:

Mitch (O'Brien) has just proposed to his girlfriend when tragedy, and terrorists, strike! Going deep undercover, Mitch becomes an assassin in the hopes of seeking revenge on those he deems responsible. Thankfully, the government decides to step in and offer him a job instead...

Oh my.

In what may be the most laughably bad beginning to any movie I've ever seen...

Ever.

I was quite ready to shut it off, as it was worse than B-Movie bad.

Laughable.

But, I wanted to see if Michael Keaton could save the film.

And save it he does, but only just barely.

Thankfully, Keaton has been on a tear in the movies since 2014, and his presence balances out a laughably bad beginning to a tolerable ending.

So while the film stays off the year end Turkey list, I wouldn't necessarily rush out to get this one.

The Film: F
Michael Keaton: A

Final Grade:  C

Welcome Home Web-Head! "Spider-Man: Homecoming"

Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)

Rated PG-13

Starring Tom Holland, Michael Keaton, Jon Favreau, Robert Downey Jr.

Directed by Jon Watts

The Story:

Peter Parker (Holland) is trying to adjust to life as Spider-Man all the while waiting for the next call-up to something big by Tony Stark (Downey Jr.). When he discovers that a new bad guy, the Vulture (Keaton) is up to something really big, Peter gets tired of being ignored while he tries to enlist help, so he tackles it on his own. Needless to say, his web-slinging and high school problems are going to cause more problems than your typical high schooler has to endure.

Welcome home to the Marvel Cinematic Universe Spidey!

The deal that allowed Marvel Studios to use Spider-Man pays off huuuuuuge for Sony as they craft the best Spider-Man film so far.

For those of you that loved the Raimi trilogy...or at least Part 2, you're welcome to think that's the best Spider-Man ever.

I never cared for Tobey in the role, nor Dunst as M.J.

I much preferred Garfield's take in the role, but those films weren't without their flaws.

Now along comes Homecoming.

Holland is quickly winning me over as Peter/Spidey.

It also helps that Keaton's Vulture is an impressive and logical foe to set this whole thing up, and he is great as the film's bad guy.

Are there flaws?

Probably.

Am I willing to overlook those?

Absolutely.

The biggest complaint I could see is the characterizations of most of Peter's supporting cast.

I simply remember: this is the Marvel Cinematic Universe, not the comics.

Then yeah, I'm good.

What else can I say at this point?

1) The Spider-Man theme song makes an appearance.
2) Possibly the best ending of any Marvel movie.
3) There are indeed 2 scenes that appear after the credits.

I highly encourage you to stick around for both!

Congratulations to all involved, I'm now going to type what I thought unthinkable just 2 short months ago...

Sorry Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2.... there's a new favorite movie of the year in town!

Good luck Thor: Ragnarok... you've got your work cut out for you.

Final Grade: A

You'll Have It His Way...Or Else! "The Founder"

The Founder (2016)

Rated PG-13

Starring Michael Keaton, Nick Offerman, John Carroll Lynch, Laura Dern, Linda Cardellini,

Directed by John Lee Hancock

The Story:

Ray Kroc (Keaton) was a salesman on the road trying to make a fortune. When a restaurant out in California ordered multiple milkshake makers, Kroc assumes it's a mistake and heads west. When he meets the McDonald brothers (Offerman & Lynch) he is struck by how efficient, and delicious, their restaurant is. He wants to franchise their restaurant. The boys are reluctant at first, but eventually relent.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Keaton is on fire with his acting career over the last few years. The Founder is no exception. He plays Kroc with a drive and ambition to get his franchises off the ground and turn them into a household name.

Stymied at nearly every turn by the McDonald brothers, he can't seem to figure out how to turn a profit on the restaurants.

Then, as Lucy Van Pelt once lamented that all she wanted was real estate...

Kroc is told to buy the land, and rent the property to the new franchises.

Not only does this turn the tables for Kroc, it also establishes McDonalds as one of the largest property owners on the planet.

Highly recommended.

Final Grade: B+

The "Spotlight" On A Great Movie About A Terrible Subject

Spotlight (2015)

Rated R

Starring Michael Keaton, Rachel McAdams, Mark Ruffalo, Brian d'Arcy James, Liev Schreiber, John Slattery, Stanley Tucci

Directed by Tom McCarthy

The Story:

It's 2001 and The Boston Globe gets a new editor (Schreiber). As he feels his way into the job, he decides to pull his Spotlight team (Keaton, McAdams, Ruffalo, James) and put them on the hunt about a Catholic priest who may have abused multiple children and his exploits were known and covered up by the Catholic Church. What starts with dead-end after dead-end soon unravels one of the most scandalous real-life stories ever told.

Wow.

That is likely the feeling you will get as you watch the film and when it concludes.

It deserves every accolade it received, and while I see a great vocal assortment of film watchers clamoring that this movie should not have received the Best Picture Oscar, and it should have gone to The Revenant instead.

That simply reminds me that many people can be wrong.

:)

The cast all give strong performances, and it's a little sad that Brian d'Arcy James doesn't even get billing on the movie poster. He gives an honest, raw performance of a news reporter who wants to tell the world, or at least his corner of it, but can't due to his duty to the story.

Strangely, only Mark Ruffalo's performance is the one I cared for the least. He seemed a little too excitable and manic, and several times I smiled thinking he would turn into The Incredible Hulk when he started stressing out.

Well worth your time and energy.

It should begin streaming on Netflix sometime this summer if  you haven't seen it by then.

Final Grade:  A

I Would Have Rather Watched The Superhero Flick "Birdman"

Birdman (2014)

Rated R

Starring Michael Keaton, Emma Stone, Zach Galifianakis, Naomi Watts, Edward Norton

Written and Directed by Alejandro Inarittu

The Story:

Riggan (Keaton) is a former movie star of the Birdman superhero franchise. But he wants to be taken seriously, so we writes, directs and stars in a play on Broadway, sinking all of his cash into the film. They bring Mike (Norton) onboard at the last minute, but his volatile acting style is going to push Riggan into making either the best play ever seen, or the final humiliating nail in his acting coffin.

Well, that was something.

Keaton plays an actor who's most successful film was a superhero film with popular sequels from over 20 years earlier in his career.

Talk about typecasting!

:)

This is an unusual film, as it is almost strictly a drama, but it keeps you watching thanks to the presence of the actors, especially Keaton and Norton who keep blowing up what you are watching and keeping it fresh and entertaining as a look behind the scenes of a Broadway play.

Then the Birdman angle rears its head...

And it is unusual, to say the least.

Is there really a Birdman?

Has he imbued his talents into Riggan?

Does Riggan actually have powers, or is he falling into psychological hallucinations?

Don't know.

Watch the film and judge for yourself.

Because just when you think you have it figured out, the movie decides to end with a scene that will have you question everything you thought you just saw.

It's a good film, but since I would likely never watch it again, it cannot be a "great film" on my grading scale, because I'm all about wanting to watch a movie all over again sometime in the near or distant future.

Final Grade: B

You Look Very Familiar... "RoboCop"

RoboCop (2014)

Rated PG-13 for violence and language

Starring Joel Kinnaman, Gary Oldman, Michael Keaton, Samuel L. Jackson,

Directed by Jose Padilha

The Story:

In the future, OmniCorp has been sending their cyborg troops overseas as peacekeeping soldiers ensuring real people aren't dying anymore.  Only America is refusing to allow these tin men to patrol the streets, and with pressure on politicians by OmniCorp president Sellars (Keaton) and crusading journalist Pat Novak (Jackson) are lobbying to get a RoboCop trial program off the ground.  The missing ingredient: the human factor.  When they receive the gift of a cop that was targeted for assassination (Kinnaman), they hardwire him into the RoboCop program.

This is not your father's RoboCop.

Or mine, for that matter.

The original, satirical take on America in the 80s is still a science fiction classic, however, my fears, as I voiced in my review last year of the original RoboCop (1987), were thankfully unfounded.

While many of names remain the same, there are subtle, and less subtle shifts in tone and behavior to the original.

Whereas Total Recall tried to change the story completely, the over-reliance of the original ended up casting a shadow that the remake could not crawl out from under.

RoboCop takes the least amount of the original and transplants it, without the satiric tone, into a possible future America that could likely exist.

Why wouldn't we want to send robotic soldiers to fight wars and save hundreds/thousands of human lives?

You would think it would be a no-brainer, but politicians want human capability for discernment to be included.

Kinnaman brings life to the suit, literally if not figuratively.  Not familiar with his work, the big names all float around as secondary figures.

At the end of the day though, if I am only going to watch another RoboCop with my kids (assuming they want to watch it again...), it would end up being this version.

Simply because the tone and violence is dialed waaaaay back this go round.

The revamped RoboCop is a perfectly serviceable science fiction/action flick for a new generation.

Final Grade: B-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: It actually wasn't too bad.  I don't think I'll rush out to own it, but I could watch it on cable in the future.

Like A Bad Rash... "Batman Returns"

Batman Returns (1992)

Rated PG-13 for language/violence

Starring: Michael Keaton, Danny DeVito, Michelle Pfeiffer, Christopher Walken

Directed by Tim Burton

The Story:

Batman is back, and this time he is trying to stop The Penguin (DeVito) who is blackmailing  Max (Walken) to worm his way into society and making the Penguin mayor!  Max's secretary, Selina Kyle (Pfeiffer) discovers some documents and is thrown to her apparent death.  Ah, but she survives and becomes... Catwoman!

Speaking of Batman films I never bothered with, this was another one.

But now I've watched it, and it was again... meh.

At least they realized that Batman should be the star of his own movies at this point, but the introduction of Catwoman is what this movie will be remembered for.

Which is a shame.  This franchise should have made a mega-star out of Keaton, but he was always overshadowed by his co-stars.

First Nicholson, and now the introduction of Catwoman.

Seemingly, one villain was no longer enough for the bat-films, and everyone thought that more villains equaled a better movie.


Wrong.

It really spelled the doom for this franchise.

At least Burton had some ability to reign in the crazy with the extra cast.

With his departure, the franchise was about to change...


Forever!

(Cue ominous foreshadowing music!)


Final Grade: C

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: No thanks, I'm good.

There's A First Time For Everything... "Batman"

Batman (1989)

Rated PG-13 for language and violence       

Starring Jack Nicholson, Michael Keaton, Kim Basinger, Pat Hingle, Billy Dee Williams, Michael Gough

Directed by Tim Burton

The Story:

Bruce Wayne (Keaton) is a billionaire with a secret: he's Batman!  A hushed urban legend, he wants to help the Gotham City Police Department, including Commissioner Gordon (Hingle) and District Attorney Harvey Dent (Williams).  However, Gotham is riddled with crime, and the latest crime boss suffers an accident at the hands of Batman and he becomes...The Joker (Nicholson).  With the police, reporters and photographer Vicki Vale (Basinger) on his trail, can Batman save the day without being caught or killed?

Happy 25th Anniversary to the movie, Batman.

I have never watched the film before.

Shocking, I know.  You'd think I would have been all over this one.

However, I was relatively uninspired by the selection of Michael Keaton as Bruce Wayne, and between all the snippets of music that year and clips on TV, I felt as if I'd pretty much seen everything I needed to with this film.

So, I finally sat down and watched it this weekend, and I'm reminded of a time when superhero movies generally sucked.

This film doesn't change my perception of that time, and I figure the popularity of the film came because it had been a long time since Superman: The Movie, and people wanted to like this, or any, superhero film.

Because...

It's pretty bad.

Those with rose-colored glasses who have 25 years of happy memories will disagree, and that's fine...

But wow.

A credit to Burton, he made a Gotham that looks and lives up to its place in the movie as an actual character.

However, the movie really should have probably been called The Joker, because let's face it, that's what most of the movie centered around.

Hey, if you're throwing all of your money and top-billing to the bad guy, you might as well make him shine.

Nicholson does his job, eating scenery and pulling out all the stops as The Joker.

Keaton does a fine job of portraying Wayne/Batman.  No real complaints there either.

The movie itself though, seeks too much synchronicity by making the Joker responsible for creating Batman and Batman responsible for creating The Joker.

Gag.

Vicki Vale provides nothing but eye candy and damsel in distress moments that grew old and tiresome by the 2nd or 3rd time she screamed in terror.

Then, by the third act, when Batman's billion dollar jet cannot hit The Joker even though it targets him perfectly, and the Joker is able to shoot down said jet with one bullet from the most ridiculous gun in movie history...

Yeah...

This is not the Batman you want... it's the Batman you deserved.

Ben Affleck can do better than this with his eyes closed.

Final Grade: C+

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I went 25 years before seeing it.  I think I'm good for one lifetime.