The Wait Is Over..."The Best Movies of 2016"

This is it.

The moment you've been waiting all year for!

Or at least, the moment I've been waiting all year for.

A look back at the best of the best of the best...sir!(Men in Black)

With just over 200 reviews this year, there were 21 movies that made my cutoff score of B+ or higher to be considered on this final countdown.

Much like the Turkeys of the Year:   2016 Turkeys  roughly 10% of the movies I watched were terrible, another 10% were great.

21 Excellent. 21 Lousy.

That leaves 80% of the movies as some sort of average, yet enjoyable, entertainment.

Which by Hollywood standards, sounds about right.

: )

Again, I can live with those odds.

So again, here's the movies that entertained me the most this year.

I watched them once, at least, and would be willing to spend my hard earned money to buy them and watch them again whenever the mood strikes me.

Without further adieu....

10) Keanu

A movie about 2 men who pretend to be gangsters in order to retrieve a kidnapped kitten.

A movie that extols the greatness of George Michael's musical career.

A movie that introduced me to Key & Peele for the first time.

A movie that begins the countdown for the best films of 2016.

I can't help it, an entertaining movie is an entertaining movie, and if you told me that those first 2 sentences would be on my Best of the Year list, I would have laughed and said, seriously?

I never even saw the trailer until a month before I finally saw the movie.

The trailer looked good.

The movie was even better.

There were a few moments of fatigue like they weren't quite sure what to do next with the story, but overall, for a first feature, it was very well done.

I'm eagerly awaiting a follow-up, whether or not it's Keanu 2.

9) Hunt For The Wilderpeople 

This little New Zealand charmer is simply great.

A coming of age dramedy about a boy that the system doesn't want who finds a foster family that finally wants him, and he begins to feel like it's home.

Then it all comes crashing down, and he decides to run away, faking his own death to convince the authorities not to look for him...

:)

Things then continue to go askew from there.

It's funny, it's poignant.

It's genius.

It's one of those perfect everything happens, yet nothing happens types of movies, but you're so engrossed with the characters you hate to see the film end.

Director Taika Waititi's 2nd straight year in the Best of the Year countdown, and if he brings this energy and fun to Thor: Ragnarok, it's quite possible he'll be back again!

8) Kung Fu Panda 3

Kung Fu what now?

How in the name of Walt Disney, did Dreamworks beat the far superior Inside Out and Zootopia?!?

Easy, I didn't exactly find those 2 to be that superior to this one.

I was but moments away from ejecting Inside Out because Sadness was soooooo annoying.

And Zootopia was cute and all, great message, blah blah blah... but it's not something I feel I can just pop in and watch any time.

Rewatchability is key for an animated film.

And that leads us to Jack Black's triumphant farewell (??!!) to us as Po, the panda with a heart of gold and never-ending tummy.

I saw the last 1/3 of the movie, about 3 times before I ever saw the beginning.

For the record, I'm also the guy that started it that last time, in a room without kids.

That's how enjoyable this franchise has been.

The jokes are fun, the action sequences are great, the voice cast is outstanding, and the series has snuck in a healthy dose of heartwarming feelings over the years.

So enjoy your Disney and Pixar, I'll be watching Kung Fu Panda multiple times before those make a 2nd play at our house.

Currently streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

7) The Shallows 

To say it's the best shark movie since Jaws is a bit of a backhanded compliment.

There really haven't even been that many good shark movies since then.

So it's not like there are dozens of great ones, and this one just blows them all away.

This is the first time anyone has really channeled the fear and tension that Spielberg threw at us back in the day.

She's alone in that water, hurting, and that shark just will not go away!

It was an edge of your seat thriller that kept us glued from beginning to end.

Hopefully it's not another 40 years until a decent shark movie comes along.

And, we'll see if this becomes a franchise...

::sigh::

6) Star Wars: The Force Awakens

What do you get when you remove George Lucas from further meddling in his own franchise?

A return to greatness!

:)

So what if it was a very familiar story, one that seemingly cribbed or downright stole much of the original Star Wars storyline?

That was a good movie, therefore if you're going to pick a Star Wars movie to duplicate, you choose from the first 3, not the "first 3".

An influx of interesting new characters and a sprinkling of characters past, it was a great way to kick off the new year, and was the first official movie to garner Best of the Year accolades.

Looking forward to seeing what is in store for the next chapter...and beyond!

5) Trumbo 

I thought seriously about discussing an actor of the year as 2016 drew to a close.

Had I done so, it would have been Bryan Cranston, hands down.  Every movie that I saw him in this year was better simply by his involvement.

But his turn as Dalton Trumbo, the blacklisted Hollywood writer in the 50s/60s who continued his efforts to care for his family while doing what he loved was phenomenal.

That he lost the Academy Award to Leonardo DiCaprio will go down in entertainment history as one of the many injustices the Academy has dealt to the entertainment industry over the years.

Which leads us back to this film, where a reputed Communist goes on to create some of the most beloved films in American history, and is unable to receive recognition all because of his political beliefs, which by the way, have nothing to do with his job.

It seems like something like that is so ancient and foreign in the 21st century, but if you think people aren't still eviscerated for their political beliefs, you've been living under some heavy rocks with no wi-fi for too long.

4) Spotlight 

Normally I let the dramas slide off my end of year lists, as I tend to go towards the more entertaining films, than the ones that pack an emotional punch.

However with Spotlight, I felt that would be a grave injustice to a great movie, an inspired cast and a horrific subject that deserves one last hurrah for a much deserved Academy Award winning Best Picture.

To the Spotlight team that helped uncover the Catholic church cover-up of priests that were preying on innocent kids for years, bravo.

Spotlight is currently streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

3) Deadpool 

Deadpool was amazing.

It was the role that Ryan Reynolds was born to play, and the best X-Men movie that Fox has ever made.

Made on a shoestring budget, it packed more action and laughs than most of the 80% of movies that didn't make this list.

It was rude, crude, hilariously funny and filled with more gags, jokes, killings and insanity per minute than any other film in likely the history of ever.

It also had a film, that much like Guardians of the Galaxy (and not Suicide Squad) helped tell the story and get the audience in the moment.

So why the $%#$%$# didn't Deadpool rank higher?

2) Doctor Strange 

Deadpool, I have come to bargain!

There is probably nobody more shocked than I am right now that not 1, but 2 movies moved in front of Deadpool for the best of the year honors.

Why, and how could I do such a thing?

As I lamented in my original review, Deadpool is not a family-friendly movie, by any stretch of the imagination. So when it comes down to what movie can I pop in and watch any time, with any audience, Wade Wilson has to always move to the back of the line if there are any kids around.

Now, all that said, Doctor Strange was a truly amazing film on its own merits.

Much like Guardians of the Galaxy a few years back, I just rolled my eyes and said "hope it doesn't suck" when the movie was announced.  None were characters I cared for, nor really wanted to see on the big screen.

Then Guardians showed their first trailer, and I was hooked on a feeling, and my worries were over, mostly.

Could it be as good as the trailer?

It was.

In fact, it was my favorite movie of 2014! In case you don't believe me...

Yep, even better than Captain America: Winter Soldier, itself an amazing movie!

However, when I saw the Doctor Strange trailers, I was still non-committal, and frankly thought they were a little boring.

I had planned on skipping it in theaters (much like I did with Avengers: Age of Ultron) and just waiting for Netflix. Then at the last moment, decided to go...

and I was honestly blown away.

It was good. It was funny. It was emotional.

It was another hit for the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

It quite possibly could have been my favorite film of the year, but there was just one roadblock in the way....

1) Captain America: Civil War 

Show of hands on who's surprised to see this at the top of my list?

Yeah, I didn't think there'd be any.

: )

It's everything we've come to love from Marvel, with the old Marvel comics twist of the good guys sometimes don't always see eye to eye and need to settle those differences with their fists.

It gave us... The Airport Battle scene.

Quite possibly the best 15+ minutes of action in any Marvel film, combined.

There was witty banter, camaraderie, and emotional character moments.

Characters were further defined, and in the end, both sides were right...both sides were wrong...

It happens in the best of families, and for now, the Marvel Universe's family is torn asunder.

I'm thinking Tony will use the phone in the next movie.

If you haven't seen this one yet, it's been streaming on Netflix since Christmas morning.

Get to it!

: )

I'll see you next year to see what 2017 has in store for us!

They're Here...The "Best Television Shows Of 2016"

Can it still be called television when none of the choices actually appeared on a network or even cable channel?

Of course it can.

It's the 21st century, and the days of all the good stuff just being on ABC, CBS and NBC are long gone.

Though I would freely be open to a return of Battle of the Network Stars.

Just saying...

: )

Now, on with the shows!!

Bosch

Take one of L.A.s finest, who has run ins with his superiors almost as often as he's having run ins with the bad guys, and you have one of the better crime dramas from the last few years. The first of two Amazon originals, Bosch has had two great seasons so far.

The consistent part from season to season is Titus Welliver's portrayal of Detective Bosch. He takes all of it in stride, not caring who he upsets to get the job done.

In a world where the world seemingly hates cops, Bosch is a reminder that most are indeed out there trying to help us navigate through a dangerous world, and as the curveballs that season two threw at the audience, life as a cop is very, very dangerous.

Luke Cage

Marvel and Netflix have done it again.

Now, much more fleshed out than his appearance in Jessica Jones, Mike Colter brings Luke Cage vividly to life in his own series.

Much like the other Netflix series, my biggest complaint with this one was that it felt about 3 episodes too long.

Hopefully in Season 2, or the Defenders, Luke Cage also doesn't have to psych himself up to actually go out and be a hero.

That did get a bit old as the series wore on.

He could have stopped so much violence if he would have just acted, instead of waiting for everyone around him to die.

Plus, of the two bad guys Cage faced, I much preferred the first one, to the one that's set to be a recurring character.

The Man In The High Castle 

What if the Axis won World War II ?

This fascinating "What If?" scenario plays out on Amazon, and the results are fascinating, and truly scary, all at the same time.

This was perhaps the slowest series for me to get hooked on, as there are a lot of people flying around the first 2 episodes as they introduce every character and you try and get a sense of who they are, what they're doing, where their allegiances truly are...

But once you're hooked, you're along for a very interesting ride.

You realize that there is no turning back time, at least as far as I know, but you get hooked on the lives of many of the characters, even those of the Japanese or German side. In many ways, they are more fleshed out and three-dimensional than the American resistance.

Season 2 is available now, and we'll see if it returns next year to the countdown.

Daredevil: Season 2

Hands down, the best 4 episodes of any and all Marvel television.

Then they added Elektra to the mix, and the results became decidedly less enthusiastic on my part.

I would have actually preferred a more long, drawn out season with the Punisher, maybe 10 total episodes.

The trial should have taken 2 to 3 episodes, but instead it was nearly a blink and you miss it, in favor of more Elektra and a ninja Matt Murdock.

It's as if Marvel wanted to remind me of why I never really bothered with this character in the first place! :)

Still, a good show, and they seriously need to use Foggy more.

Seriously.

Making A Murderer

Was it a documentary?
Was it a television show?

This was the idea that I wrestled with at the end of the year, and ultimately put this under television while the ESPN 30 for 30 wound up in the documentary section.

Could I have flipped them?

Absolutely.

I decided that at over 10 hours, I have to call this gripping documentary television, since it was divided into episodic segments instead of just a 2 hour program.

I heard criticisms after it aired that the directors were only giving one side of the story.

That may, or may not be true, but the side they present is sooooo amazingly wrapped in cover-up after conspiracy after shady dealings that you might literally yell at the television at the end of each episode when the latest bombshell gets dropped.

It should make you seriously question the entire legal system at the least, and make you seriously hope you never find yourself facing its wrath, whether guilty OR innocent.

I'm waiting for an additional episode to air that reveals what has happened to several of the people in the documentary since the film has been released.

If nothing else, it appears that some justice is indeed being finally served.

Stranger Things 

This is one of those few times that I watched something at the same time as the rest of the world.

: )

While we didn't binge, we did move along much quicker than usual when watching a Netflix series.

Yes, it was as good as you heard or were led to believe.

I maintain that if you're not hooked in the initial 8 minutes of episode 1, then yes, this is not the series for you.

My little 5 year old even came in during the middle of the episode and wanted to know what happened to Will.

She may have been the biggest fan of the show, but everyone was entertained.

A great cast, including possibly the best group of child actors to ever assemble since The Goonies.

Also, for me, it was the perfect length.

I've often criticized the Marvel series for being about 4 episodes too long, and Stranger Things came along and proved that I was right.

:)

The episodes fly by, and with no real fluff and bluster, combines nicely into 8 compact episodes that grab you at the beginning and hold you until the end.

Season 2's bar is already set incredibly high, so hopefully it will make it to Best of the Year list in the future.

Looking forward to what might be  heading my way in 2017!

True Story! The Best Documentaries Of 2016

I do like to take a moment at the end of the year to shine a spotlight back on the best documentaries of the year.

They usually go unheralded or unappreciated, but thanks to so many different services, so many of them can be enjoyed at home.

They often are so unbelievable, you couldn't script a more entertaining story if you try.

Here's a look back at some of my favorites:

We'll start with a special shout out to ESPN 30 for 30.

Four Falls of Buffalo
The '85 Bears
Believeland

Those were the only 3 that I watched this year, but much like others I've seen in years past, they are some of the most entertaining episodes you're likely to see.

I debated whether or not to put this on the best of television since it is an ESPN program, but decided in the end to go this route.

Each episode is a movie in itself, and rarely has anything to do (besides being about sports) with one another.

I've still got plenty of them that I haven't watched, but I haven't seen a bad one yet.

Most 30 for 30s are currently streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

Dark Horse

When you take a poor Welsh town that gathers a group together and pools their money in the longshot attempt to raise a champion race horse well you can kind of tell where this movie is going to go.

After all, it's rare that documentaries get made about losers, right? :)

It's impossible not to root for them as they relive their road to glory and heartbreak.

The people are so genuine and warm, and the story is so magnificently laid out, it's the stuff that Disney films are made for.

But this one is all true.

Being Canadian

A documentary that sets out to discover what Canadians are, confirms that most of the stereotypes that the rest of the world has about Canadians is mostly true.

And really, that's not a bad thing at all when you consider how the rest of the world views them and they view themselves.

Here's a hint, around the world, once they reveal that they aren't American, they are usually treated very well.

:(

Which I suppose says as much about them as it does about us.

: )

This is currently streaming on Amazon for those with Prime.

National Lampoon: Drunk Stoned Brilliant Dead


If you have a sense of humor whatsoever, you will probably find this look back at National Lampoon right up your alley.

Especially considering that much of the late 20th century/21st century humor/comedy was spawned from the very pages/ideas/minds of those that worked there.

Of course, if you hate Saturday Night Live and all that it has done to keep comedy coming to you weekly with rotating casts for over 40 years, then you also know where to place some of your blame and hatred.

:)

Electric Boogaloo

If you rented a movie in the 80s, you know their movies.

Now is your chance to know the whole story. It's an even wilder ride than you could have possibly imagined.

It's quite an impressive feat that they pulled off in making their vast catalog of movies.

It wasn't until they broke their own rules and attempted to make their movies look like they had a huge budget, that it all blew up in their faces.

Still streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

We Are Twisted F***ing Sister 

I suppose unless you hate Twisted Sister, there's no way you can watch this documentary and not feel for the band and root for them to succeed.

Beginning at their origins and leading up to adding Dee Snyder as their front man, this film chronicles the rise and fall, and more rises and fall than the best roller coaster you've ever been on.

And it stops just before they hit it big with MTV and the whole world gets to know them.

Very well done.

Still streaming on Netflix as of this writing.



Looking forward to what 2017 has to offer!!

First Person Failure..."Hardcore Henry"

Hardcore Henry (2015)  


Rated R

Starring Andrei Dementiev, Sharlto Copley, Danila Kozlovsky, Haley Bennett, Tim Roth

Written and Directed by Ilya Naishuller

The Story:

Henry (Dementiev) wakes up to see Estelle (Bennett) putting him back together on a lab table. She tells him sorry his memory is off, but they are married and there's a bad guy, Akan (Kozlovsky) trying to catch Henry and steal his technology. When Estelle is kidnapped, Henry goes into rescue mode to save his love.

So if you saw the trailer for this film, you know exactly what to expect.

It's basically a first person shooter videogame brought to life.

Lots of stunts, lots of action.

Little plot that hasn't already been used in a million other films.

And it's not really that good.

I think the reason why boils down to the first person shooter aspect.

In a videogame, the first person is you.

But this is a movie, it's scripted to go a certain way, so you, the audience, have no control over Henry.

And since Henry isn't really you, and there is no actor to watch, empathize or sympathize with, there is no emotional attachment or investment in the film.

This isn't watching John McClane get beat down and hoping he'll come up with one solution after the next to beat the bad guys.

This is watching some arms and legs punch and kick and blow stuff up.

Watch the trailer...it's pretty much the entire movie, but with a better soundtrack, and much less time wasted.

Oh, and PS:

If you didn't think the "wife" was in on it the whole time, you haven't seen enough films yet.

Oops.

Spoiler.

:)

Final Grade: F

Genre Mashing On The Cheap..."Daylight's End"

Daylight's End (2016)

Not Rated

Starring Johnny Strong, Lance Henriksen, Louis Mandylor, Chelsea Edmundson

Directed by William Kaufman

The Story:

A drifter (Strong) saves a cop (Edmundson) from an ambush that kills her partner. She takes him back to the police precinct promising him a car and all the gas/food he needs to be on his way. However, they are trying to escape to a sanctuary to get away from the bloodthirsty savages that lurk in the shadows.

File this one under wanting to make a budget horror end of the world film but they couldn't choose between zombies or vampires, so they kind of combined the two into one.

That way you can get the best of both worlds without working too hard.

Throw in a dash of Mad Max, Assault on Precinct 13, I Am Legend, videogames and just about whatever else you can think of, and this movie has got you covered.

Henriksen of course is the face and name you recognize.

Everyone else in the cast is competent, but no names or faces that I recognized.

It could have used a little more tweaking and originality and a bit less borrowing from everything else, but it was good enough to keep my interest.

Final Grade: C

Not Your Daddy's Renaissance Fair..."Knights Of Badassdom"

Knights of Badassdom (2013)

Rated R

Starring Ryan Kwanten, Steve Zahn, Peter Dinklage, Jimmi Simpson

Directed by Joe Lynch

The Story:

When some Live Action Role Players accidentally conjure up a live action demon, all hell is literally going to break loose. Do these  wannabes have what it takes to save the world?

Okay, when the subject of your movie is LARPers bringing a demon to the world and then trying to vanquish it, you either need to be a big budget, A-list actors that take the very subject with a degree of seriousness just this side of Hamlet...

Or you embrace the silliness of it, bring together an ensemble of great character actors, slap the most awesome name this side of an 80s movie, and see what happens.

As you can see from the cast picture, they opted for the easier film to make.

It's silly.

But totally watchable.

It's a horror-comedy with fantasy/sci-fi tendencies.

Not every film can make that claim.

Plus, nearly every character in the film is totally enjoyable, thanks in no small part to the great cast that they managed to assemble for the film.

To be fair, Danny Pudi's part is way too small, but what can you do?

So if the cast photo and title aren't enough to make you want to see it...

well, you take your films too seriously.

; )

Currently streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

C+

The Trek And The Furious..."Star Trek Beyond"

Star Trek Beyond (2016)

PG-13

Starring Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Zoe Saldana, Karl Urban, Simon Pegg, Sofia Boutella, John Cho, Anton Yelchin,

Directed by Justin Lin

The Story:

The crew of the Enterprise lands on an alien planet where their latest enemy (Elba) vows to destroy the Federation. With help from an alien (Boutella) and the Beastie Boys, perhaps Kirk (Pine) and his crew can save the galaxy.

Again.

So at this point, you either love (or at least tolerate) the rebooted franchise, or you hate it.

I'm not sure there's a middle ground.

I've enjoyed both the original series and the reboot for what they are: entertainment.

I enjoyed this installment of the series more than Into Darkness, mostly because I wish they would create new storylines for this crew versus rehashing old storylines.

Though this plot seems vaguely reminiscent of some previously seen episode, or movie...

maybe GalaxyQuest?

:)

Justin Lin moves from the Fast & Furious franchise to take over the Trek franchise, at least for one film.

If he does stick around, expect The Rock to show up in another sequel, soon, but that's about the time the quality of the franchise gets even better.

My biggest complaints for the film:

Karl Urban is woefully underused, as usual, and is still the best character the franchise has.

Star Trek: Beyond.  Star Trek-Beyond.

It's killing me to not have some type of punctuation in the movie title.

Otherwise, I need to know Star Trek Beyond...What?

What have they gone beyond?!?

;)

Final Grade: B-

Fight The "Urge" To Watch This One

Urge (2016)  

Rated R

Starring Justin Chatwin, Danny Masterson, Ashley Greene, Nick Thune, Alexis Knapp, Chris Geere,

Directed by Aaron Kaufman

The Story:

A weekend getaway with a group of friends on an island paradise takes a disturbing turn after a visit to a nightclub run by The Man (Brosnan). He offers them a drug that has the effect of being next to God, but the catch: you can only use it once. Everyone has an amazing night except Jason (Chatwin) who is used to getting high, so barely feels any effects whatsoever. Everyone else decides that they have to do it again... and when they do, all of their inhibitions are stripped away, and things take a decidedly dark turn.

Meh.

There were flashes of interest here and there from this movie, but overall, it was a dud.

The Man, of course, is God.

I know, spoilers....sorry...

But it seems pretty obvious throughout the movie, and there is an end-credit scene that pretty much spells it out for those that didn't figure it out the first time.

Again, given the option of free will, man will always mess up their lives.

:)

So when presented with the ultimate drug that can only be used once, naturally, most people want to take it again to feel that amazing.

But the 2nd time...well, things go horribly wrong, and baser instincts take over and people give in to any and all urges and begin to kill one another, among other things.

Thanks, but I'll pass.

Final Grade: D+

It's Dangerous To Wander "Into The Grizzly Maze"

Into the Grizzly Maze (2015)

Rated R

Starring James Marsden, Thomas Jane, Piper Perabo, Scott Glenn, Michaela McManus, Adam Beach,

Directed by David Hackl

The Story:

Rowan (Marsden) and Beckett (Jane) are two brothers who haven't seen each other in ages. When Rowan returns to town in Alaska, he's on a mission to help a friend. However, those plans are in jeopardy when both brothers need to survive the Alaskan wilderness while they are being stalked by a grizzly bear.

This was a pretty effective little thriller, where the monster is told more than shown, so much like Jaws, the scares are often implied versus explicitly shown.

However, when they do allow the bear to attack, there's buckets of gore aplenty. :)

Billy Bob Thornton is on hand as the Quint character who is there to stop the bear, however, well, as the Quint character, you should already know how that's going to turn out, right?

In addition to the issues with the bear, the group also has to deal with their feelings for each other.

Even in the face of a man-eating beast, some differences don't just go away because you're in danger.

Otherwise, you've got a great cast doing their best to make you feel their fear and it's a pretty good little B movie to pass the time.
Final Grade:  B- / C+ range

Life Imitates Are..."Mimesis"

Mimesis (2011)

Rated R

Starring Allan Maldonado, Sid Haig, Lauren Mae Schafer, Courtney Gains, Taylor Piedmonte, David Brown, Jana Thompson, Gavin Grazer, Bryana Dorfman,

Written and Directed by Douglas Schulze

The Story:

A group of horror fans are having a great time at a convention. However, after a night of partying, several of them wake up the next morning, unsure of where they are or how they got there. When zombies begin to attack, the people must band together and try and survive their own personal Night of the Living Dead. 

This has all the premise of a great idea on paper, but something didn't quite translate for me on the screen.

There's a couple of interesting things that happen along the way, but for the most part, you know what's going to happen, to whom, and when.

Of course, that's basic Horror 101, and part of the reason these movies get watched in the first place.

;)

Most of the actors are a bit bland in the charisma department, so it very much has the look and feel of a budget "B Movie", but none of the extra charm and appeal that makes it a cult classic.

However, apparently it made enough people happy, or enough money, to warrant a sequel coming next year, so there's that.

I won't be chomping at the bit to see it, but maybe on a slow week...

Final Grade: C   

Beast Mode: Activated! "Rapture Palooza"

Rapture Palooza (2013)  

Rated R

Starring Craig Robinson, Anna Kendrick, John Francis Daley, Rob Corddry, Ana Gasteyer, John Michael Higgins, Ken Jeong,

Directed by Paul Middleditch

The Story:

The Rapture has happened and the souls that were left behind now have to deal with living on Earth under the Beast (Robinson). However, when he sets his sights on Lindsey (Kendrick) to be his bride, she and her boyfriend (Daley) have to formulate a plan to stop the Anti-Christ once and for all.

So how do you make a comedy about the Rapture?

Because, seriously, this one didn't quite hit the mark.

: )

It's a great cast full of some amazing comedic actors, but ultimately many of them are left floundering in their roles with little to do, or nothing of great consequence.

There is the occasional laugh, but overall, it's a big pass.

Not a complete failure of a movie, just a failure to capitalize on everything that was right in front of them, but they failed to utilize properly.

I mean when you have God (Jeong) vs. the Beast battling for world supremacy in a hot tub for the fate of the world, you just sort of expect and hope for a little more that what you ultimately get.


Final Grade: C-

I Would Like A Different "Wish For Christmas"

Wish For Christmas (2016)  

Rated PG

Starring Anna Fricks, Joey Lawrence, Leigh-Allyn Baker, Bill Engvall,

Directed by John K.D. Graham

The Story:

Anna (Fricks) finds out that the Christmas dance at school has been moved to Christmas Eve. When she tells her parents (Lawrence & Baker), they tell her sorry, that's when they go to Christmas Eve service at church, and she won't be attending the dance. That night, she wishes that her parents didn't have such a strong faith in God. The next morning, her wish comes true. What begins as a cool dream come true for Anna, the scope of what she's done begins affecting more and more people in the community.

Just to be clear, don't confuse this one with A Wish For Christmas, A Christmas Wish, or The Christmas Wish.

This movie is completely different, I would assume, except for the whole making a wish, and it being Christmas time.

: )

Except I haven't seen any of those yet, and now I want to!

Much like I do every year, while watching our ever-growing list of holiday favorites over and over (and over!) again, I try and sample some of the new offerings, because you just never know when you'll find one that is good enough to add to the list.

Since I don't have cable, I don't get a chance to just turn on Hallmark, Lifetime or Free Form (formerly ABC Family) and get sucked in to their annual marathons of new films and old favorites.

This is probably a good thing.

: )

So I find new ones from Netflix and add them to the pile, and here we are.

Speaking of piles...

;)

It's not...bad...but it's far from good.

Anna is a spoiled brat, so it's really hard to sympathize with her at any point in the movie.

Her parents go from Bible-thumping to Bible-dumping overnight, literally, and the dialogue and interaction between the characters is less than stellar.

The script needed some overhauling, because aside from a strangely out-of-place Santa (Engvall) who exists for the sole reason to remind Anna that life isn't awesome for everyone in the world, most of the characters are one dimensional and hard for the audience to warm up to.

The ending seems forced, as does the reaction of the participants.

Unlike last year's attempts (Christmas Town, A Christmas Eve Miracle) however, I'm not going to put this one on the naughty list.

It's heart was in the right place, and the story could have been punched up and made much better.

Especially considering how talented at least half the cast has been in other things they've done.

Final Grade: C-

"The Double" Dose Of Jesse Eisenberg Is Too Much To Endure

The Double (2013)

Rated R

Starring Jesse Eisenberg

Directed by Richard Ayoade

The Story:

Simon (Eisenberg) slaves away at a mundane job. He's timid, shy, and pretty much a doormat to the world. Now along comes James, he looks just like Simon, and is his complete opposite in every way, leading to great complications in Simon's life.

Bah.

Remember my 20 minute rule?

Well, by about 9 1/2 minutes in, I was ready to click this one off.

I held out until just shy of 14 minutes, then I could take it no longer.

I've seen "sinister" Eisenberg before: Lex Luthor.

We all know how well that turned out.

:)

What's shaping up to a be a poor man's "Fight Club" is just not entertaining.

At least that movie had 2 entertaining, charismatic leads.

Here, we're faced with a double dose of Eisenberg, that's just two too much.

Congratulations, here's the first "F" of the 2017 Turkey of the Year season.

Final Grade: F

One Last Thing..."Just Before I Go"

Just Before I Go (2014)

Rated R

Starring Seann William Scott, Olivia Thirlby, Garret Dillahunt, Kate Walsh, Rob Riggle,

Directed by Courtney Cox

The Story:

Ted (Scott) has had enough of his life, so he decides that he wants to end things. However, before he can do that, he wants to go back home and face those that he feels are responsible for how he turned out, whether it's his least favorite teacher, the school bully, or his own family. However, with Greta (Thirlby) wanting to document the end of his life as he faces each encounter, things don't go as well as he planned, and things begin to get complicated.

This dramedy from first-time director Cox brings a talented cast to tackle some very serious issues with a touch of lightness and humor.

Scott does his best to make Ted about as far away from Stifler as he can, and you empathize with his plight and wonder if/when he will realize that suicide is never a good option, or if he will succumb to his demons and we are witness to his final moments on earth.

It's a big and talented cast surrounding Scott, each with their own storyline to juggle and make him seem like the sanest character in the film.

The cast and storyline was engaging enough to keep me entertained. There were some things here and there that could have been stronger and made this a better/more memorable film when all is said and done.

There are some parts that are almost too over-the-top to believe and often work against the overall flow of the film.

That said, it was still entertaining, and I'm glad I got a chance to see it.

Final Grade:  B-

A Tale Of Two Kringles..."Miracle On 34th Street"

Miracle on 34th Street (1947)

Not Rated

Starring Edmund Gwynn, Maureen O'Hara, Natalie Wood, John Payne

Directed by

Miracle on 34th Street (1994)

Rated PG

Starring Richard Attenborough, Elizabeth Perkins, Mara Wilson, Dylan McDermott, J. T. Walsh,

The Story:

Mrs. Walker runs the Thanksgiving Day parade for New York's biggest department store. When her Santa turns up drunk, a kindly gentlemen named Kris steps in and becomes Santa Claus. However, Mr. Kringle insists that he is the one and only Kris Kringle, and winds up in court defended by a lawyer who believes in Kris as much as he believes that he loves Mrs. Walker and her daughter, Susan.

Will he be able to pull off the biggest courtroom shocker of all-time?

That pretty much sums up both movies, though for some reason, they insisted on changing Fred Gailey (Payne) to Bryan Bedford (McDermott). Who knows, maybe someone complained that you can't use the name Gailey without offending people?

:)

So naturally, I'm a big fan of the original. I'd say I've seen it at least 20 times or so, it's one that gets played usually every other year or so at the house.

The remake?

I saw it yesterday for the first time.

Nowhere near as bad as I had feared.

Like Macy's, I really wanted nothing to do with this remake whatsoever.

But, it's streaming on Netflix, and Tis the Season and all that. :)

So I watched it, and I smiled at some of the jokes.

The best parts were those that were lifted nearly intact from the first film.

While Kris (Gwynn) doesn't sing in Dutch, Kris (Attenborough) does know sign language and communicates with a deaf girl.

Both are sentimental heart-string moments in their respective versions.

It seems like the updated version very much wanted to make it clear that Darcy (Perkins) and Bryan would date, fall in love, and get married.

Exploring their relationship more was a nice updated touch, but when she spurns him at the end of their date...

That's just a level of spite that makes Mrs. Walker seem utterly cold, and actually rather unlikable.

It seemed too much like this film had to get to the happy ending, and they were determined to make it happen, no matter what came in front of it.

There is no crisis of conscience like in the original when Mrs. Walker (O'Hara) thinks Santa is insane, then realizes her mistake and wants to do anything she can to help.

It's at that point that she truly begins to believe, and I don't feel it in the remake.

Likewise, with Susan (Wood / Wilson) you see her change of heart as the film moves on, until the end when she is heartbroken that Kris isn't Santa, and then elated when she realizes it's him.

The remake, Susan waffles in her emotion in nearly every scene, either looking depressed or elated, with very little range in between.

With both versions of the film, my favorite parts are the courtroom scenes. Both versions contain some great interplay among the characters, and both believable and fun ways in which, yes indeed, the law could very much confirm that Kringle is the real deal.

That said, it seems like they shorten up the newer courtroom scene and just confirm that Santa exists, and Kringle is him.

Oops.

Spoilers.

:)

The original did it in a much more inspired way, but it's hard to beat the original sometimes, so steering clear and trying something new isn't a bad option.

But this is one case where I'll stick with the original, every time.

Final Grades:

1947 - A

1994 - C+

It's Called T.M.I. For A Reason..."Thanks For Sharing"

Thanks For Sharing (2012)

Rated R

Starring Mark Ruffalo, Gywneth Paltrow, Tim Robbins, Josh Gad, Joely Richardson, Patrick Fugit, Pink,

Directed by Stuart Blumberg

The Story:

Adam (Ruffalo) meets Phoebe (Paltrow) and the two really hit it off. It's the first girl he's been seriously interested in, possibly ever. She tells him up front that she just has to make sure she never dates another guy who's an addict. No problem...

Except Adam is addicted to sex, and is in year 5 of his recovery.

And there you have the basis for one of the most  unusual, yet compelling romantic dramedies that you're likely to see.

Supporting Ruffalo are Robbins as his sponsor, and he is saddled with issues of his own and his family (Richardson & Fugit).

Then there is Josh Gad as a leacherous member of their group who doesn't seem to want to even change, but ends up having possibly the biggest storyline changes of them all by the end of the film.

The movie wisely incorporates these addtional stories to make a fuller movie instead of one that just concentrates soley on Phoebe & Adam's relationship. It allows the focus to shift and not just burn the audience out on a love story.

There were a few hiccups along the way that keep this movie from being a must-see, but the cast makes you empathize with them and want to see it through to the end.

Final Grade:  B

Took Me Long Enough... "Kung Fu Panda 3"

Kung Fu Panda 3 (2016)

Rated PG

Starring Jack Black, Bryan Cranston, Dustin Hoffman, Angelina Jolie, Seth Rogen, Jackie Chan, Lucy Liu, Kate Hudson, J.K. Simmons, David Cross, James Hong

Directed by Alessandro Carloni, Jennifer Yuh

The Story:

Po (Black) reunites with his long lost father (Cranston), much to the chagrin of his current father (Hong) and they journey to the hidden Panda village so that Po can master his chi. Kai (Simmons) has been defeating the masters both in the spirit world and is now back in our world, more powerful than ever. Po must teach the new pandas how to do the Fu in order to save his friends, and the world!

So you might remember earlier this year when the kids went to the movies and saw this one:

"There was a very good plot. A great balance between the action and the humor.  It didn't let me down with the franchise and go out on a low note.  I'd give it an A!"

"Amazing.  I give it an A!"

"I think it was very funny, not too serious and not all action. I really liked what the movie did with both of Po's dads. I give it an A!"

"So far the best film I've seen all year. It didn't exceed the the greatness of Part 2, but it may very well have equaled it. Definitely an A."

"It was great. There were two sad parts that made me cry sad tears. I was glad I got to see it."

" It was phenomenal. By far the prettiest of all three movies and the animation was just spectacular. Not quite as good as Part 2, but really, really, really good nonetheless."



How am I supposed to compete with those kinds of reviews?

:)

So the movie has been in our house since the release, and I managed to walk in at the part where Po begins training the panda village.

I didn't really want to review half a movie, so I figured I'd probably catch the beginning sooner or later.

That said, what I had seen was the usual awesome work from Dreamworks, and a lot of fun from the cast.

Especially inspired work from a villainous J.K. Simmons who seems to be having a blast as the baddest bad guy that nobody has ever heard of.

Then the movie came to Netflix streaming, and it's played a few times since then, and I seemingly always arrive when it's time for Po to start training the village.

So I finally grabbed the remote and started it from scratch.

I wasn't disappointed.

Again, Cranston's hot streak of great movies chugs along, and it's a nice conclusion to the Kung Fu Panda trilogy.

Whether they continue, or not, it's been a great series of films, and Dreamworks should be very proud of what they've accomplished.

Can't argue with the kids on this one.

It's really good, and possibly just a bit less awesome than Part 2.

But what a great trilogy they've entertained us with!

Final Grade: A

Try To Avoid The "Holidays"

Holidays (2016)

Rated R

Starring A Whole Lot Of Actors

Directed by A Whole Lot of Directors

The Stories:

In about 15 minutes, you will get a scary tale centering on most of the holidays that make up a year.


I honestly don't know how to possibly review this one.

It's several 15 minute segments, some with more inspired dread than others, and then they all end.

BANG!

Usually with a jump scare at the end as if that were the payoff.

The problem....

Most of the films aren't that scary.

Or, if they are, the ending seemingly undoes any tension or goodwill that the movie might have earned along the way.

Plus, in 15 minutes, it's hard to care for any character so that when they get theirs at the end, or get away with murder or what have you, you have a general feeling of...

Meh.

Next holiday!

None of them are terrible to watch, and if you think of it as just watching a 15 minute short film, it goes by and then it goes by, and by, and by...

Then it's over and you've survived.

Uninspiring and flat spring to mind when I try and remember each of the segments.

Congratulations, you're the first film eligible for 2017 Turkey of the Year!

:)

Streaming on Netflix as of  this writing.

Final Grade: D+ 

"The Infiltrator" Has A Very Dangerous Job

The Infiltrator (2016)

Rated R

Starring Bryan Cranston, John Leguizamo, Juliet Aubrey, Diane Kruger, Benjamin Bratt,

Directed by Brad Furman

The Story:

Robert Mazur (Cranston) is a Customs agent who goes deep undercover to find the bigger fish that are bringing drugs into America. The more he meets with Roberto Alcaino (Bratt) the closer they become as friends. Is Mazur going to be able to make the arrests when the time comes, or is he going to go too deep undercover?

There's a lot of story to cram into a 2 hour drama, but for the most part, the entire cast and crew manage to pull it off without too many loose end/plot holes that make you forget you're watching a movie.

Cranston continues to be the best part of any movie that he's in.

Maybe one of these years I'll get around to watching Breaking Bad, but for now I'll just keep enjoying his roles in films.

The movie does a nice job of trying to show how Mazur had to balance his work life and his home life, and how one small slip of the tongue (I'm engaged...) or taking his real wife out on the town, he would have to think fast to get himself out of these jams.

The rest of the cast matches Cranston's energy in scene for scene, especially Leguizamo as his partner where they both sometimes fear that the other may have gone over to the other side during their investigation.

The biggest complaint I've seen about this movie is that Narcos did it better.

Well, I would hope a continuing series would do a better job of telling a richer story than a 2 hour movie.

Since I haven't had a chance to watch Narcos yet, at least they've set the bar high for it.

I'll try that one in the future, either before or after Breaking Bad.

:)

Final Grade: Solid B