Nic Cage Is An "Army Of One"

Army of One (2016)  

Rated R

Starring Nicolas Cage, Russell Brand, Wendy McLendon-Covey

Directed by Larry Charles

The Story:

When Gary Faulkner (Cage) gets a message from God (Brand) to go find Osama Bin Laden in Pakistan, the unemployed handyman on dialysis sets out on his holy crusade.

Is this the part where I say it's based on a true story?

Of course it is.

And filing this one under the truth is stranger than fiction department, it is indeed a crazy ride that Faulkner embarked on, and came so very, very, very close to succeeding.

How close?

Well, let's just say that within days of Faulkner's last attempt, mission accomplished.

You can draw your own conclusions from there.

So when you say you need to portray a man that's just this shy of crazy on screen, who can you turn to?

The obvious answer is Nic Cage. And he's at his manic best...and yet...he's also oddly restrained.

Toning down his usual over-the-top Cageisms, he channels the feelings of man who is sincerely convinced that God wants him to find Bin Laden when all other efforts have proven futile.

The movie wanders a bit here and there, but for the most part, you remain glued to the proceedings wondering what the heck is going to happen next with Faulkner.

In that case, mission accomplished!

Final Grade: C+ 

Fight The "Urge" To Watch This One

Urge (2016)  

Rated R

Starring Justin Chatwin, Danny Masterson, Ashley Greene, Nick Thune, Alexis Knapp, Chris Geere,

Directed by Aaron Kaufman

The Story:

A weekend getaway with a group of friends on an island paradise takes a disturbing turn after a visit to a nightclub run by The Man (Brosnan). He offers them a drug that has the effect of being next to God, but the catch: you can only use it once. Everyone has an amazing night except Jason (Chatwin) who is used to getting high, so barely feels any effects whatsoever. Everyone else decides that they have to do it again... and when they do, all of their inhibitions are stripped away, and things take a decidedly dark turn.

Meh.

There were flashes of interest here and there from this movie, but overall, it was a dud.

The Man, of course, is God.

I know, spoilers....sorry...

But it seems pretty obvious throughout the movie, and there is an end-credit scene that pretty much spells it out for those that didn't figure it out the first time.

Again, given the option of free will, man will always mess up their lives.

:)

So when presented with the ultimate drug that can only be used once, naturally, most people want to take it again to feel that amazing.

But the 2nd time...well, things go horribly wrong, and baser instincts take over and people give in to any and all urges and begin to kill one another, among other things.

Thanks, but I'll pass.

Final Grade: D+

Everybody Loves "The Investigator" 's Brother. You'll See...

The Investigator (2013)

Rated PG-13

Starring Wade Williams, David Sanborn, Mollyana Ward,

Directed by Curtis Graham

The Story:

James (Williams) is a detective. His world is shattered when his team kills an unarmed suspect and his wife (Ward) suffers a miscarriage. James is forced into retirement, and he grows bitter and disillusioned with his life and his faith.  His brother Paul (Sanborn) pulls some strings and gets James hired to coach baseball and teach Criminal Justice at a local private high school.

There you have the basic precepts of this movie inspired by a true story.

Religion does indeed play a significant role in this film.

James turns his back on God, but when he winds up teaching in a Christian school, naturally the students keep questioning him about his faith and beliefs.

When James uncovers some nefarious dealings in the school, he further ostracizes himself from his students and the faculty.

It's when he puts the very existence of Jesus on trial that the film finds its center and helps James heal.

Along the way, you'll also be treated to some of the worst baseball scenes ever filmed.

:)

Seriously, who swings at a pitch at face level?

As for who the famous brother is, well if you didn't get the hint from the title of this review, shame on my hint for not being more obvious.

It's Ray Romano from Everybody Loves Raymond.

Final Grade: B- / C+ range

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Not quite great enough to rush out and buy it, but if it becomes streaming down the road, I'd certainly watch it again.

Something Many Already Believe..."Heaven Is For Real"

Heaven Is For Real (2014)

Rated PG

Starring Greg Kinnear,  Kelly Reilly, Thomas Haden Church, Connor Corum, Lane Styles, Margo Martindale

Written and Directed by Randall Wallace

The Story:

Todd Burpo (Kinnear) is a pastor whose local church is growing and loving his lessons.  Life of course is strange, and one day his son Colton (Corum) falls ill and has to be rushed to the hospital.  It turns out his appendix has burst and he is probably going to die.  The community prays for little Colton, and miraculously, he survives.  When he gets home though, he begins to share with his family exactly what he saw and did while he was under the knife, and these revelations shake the foundations of everything his family and the local congregation believes.

This is indeed based on a true story, with the book going into far more detail than they can do in a 90 minute movie, so naturally some things are going to be condensed.

I anticipate this movie will naturally divide audiences.

Those that believe will likely quite enjoy it.  Those who do not, will not.

But putting aside religious or philosophical differences, know that there are 3 fundamentally cool things that happen to little Colton in this movie that should not be discounted from his trip to Heaven:

1) He hugs his big sister.

No, not Cassie (Styles).  Instead, Colton meets a little girl who looks similar to Cassie but has no name.  We, and Colton, learn that Todd and Sonja (Reilly) had a miscarriage after they had Cassie and before Colton came along.  They never told anyone, and as they never knew what the baby was going to be, they never named her. 

Bring a tissue.

2) He meets his grandpa.

When he tells his dad about his meeting with Pop, Todd shows him a picture of his dad.  Colton says no, that's not him.  Todd then unearths a long-buried picture from a trunk of his dad as a young man and shows hit to Colton.  That's him.

Cool.

3) When shown pictures of Jesus from the Bible, Colton says no, that's not what he looks like.  Time passes and it is forgotten.

Then, while watching a news program highlighting a little girl from Lithuania who has been painting pictures of her visit to Heaven...

Colton walks by, looks and his mouth drops.  "That's him".

Nice!

Cue the goosebumps and tears of joy.

There's more than just that, but hopefully that makes you interested in seeing the film.

I think you'll be glad you did.

Final Grade: B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I could watch it again in a few years. :)

A Disaster Of Biblical Proportions..."Noah"

Noah (2014)

Rated PG-13

Starring Russell Crowe, Jennifer Connelly, Anthony Hopkins, Ray Winstone, Emma Watson, Logan Lerman, Douglas Booth,

Written and Directed by Darren Aronofsky

The Story:

Noah (Crowe) is having some visions that the world is coming to an end.  His visions tell him to make an ark, and that all of the innocent animals will be saved, and humanity must be extinguished to pay for our sins.

How cheery!

How do you take a tale from the Old Testament that is both a warning and a sign of promise from God and turn it upside down and make it a miserable experience?

Give it to Darren Aronofsky.

He manages to suck any semblance of hope and awe from this tale and present a shambles of a mess that is both baffling as it is overproduced.

Basically, even Michael Bay wouldn't produce a disaster flick this bad.

I only invoke Bay because in the middle of this movie, you will see Transformers.

No, I'm not kidding.

In fact, as I chatted with my oldest while watching this movie, it became more fun to explain what the movie was like if we used the higher profile roles that these actors played before:


Jor-El (Crowe) senses that Kyrpton is doomed.  He seeks the advice of his All-Father, Odin (Hopkins) on what to do.  Odin advises him to take his wife, Betty Brant (Connelly) and with the help of the aforementioned Transformers, create a great ark to house all of the animals of the world.  Along for the ride are their children, Shem (Booth) who married Hermione (Watson) and using powerful magic hope to keep the human race alive.  Their middle son, Percy Jackson (Lerman) and a third son who is totally inconsequential to anything.

See?

Already, you WANT to see THAT movie!

I'm not even going to bash this movie from a Christian point of view, which I could, but what would be the point?

I'm sticking strictly as a movie fan.

Regardless of faith, this movie should bore you to tears, while simultaneously making you laugh at the sheer ludicrousness of the situation. 

How does the bad guy get on the ark? 

Ugh... so many implausible questions arise from this one.

I've only seen one other movie by Aronofsky, The Wrestler.  I was unimpressed by that film also.

I don't think I'll be back for a 3rd chance of disappointment.

Final Grade: D

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I offered to pay each and every one of my children 5 dollars per kid to watch it again.  I had no takers. :)

A Ride Worth Catching..."The Sunset Limited"

The Sunset Limited (2011)
Rated R for language

Starring Tommy Lee Jones, Samuel L. Jackson

Directed by Tommy Lee Jones

The Story:

Black (Jackson) stops White (Jones) from jumping in front of the Sunset Limited train.  Feeling responsible, White keeps Black  at his apartment overnight.  The two engage in a heated debate about life and death, God and nothingness.

If you want to see anything other than two of the greatest actors from this generation debate and fight about their beliefs, this is not the movie for you.

That's all you are going to get.

Based on the play, the set is Black's dingy apartment.

Aside from occasional noise from the neighborhood and a few distinct visual clues from a nearby window...

The movie rests solely on the shoulders of the two leads.

Hey Wait...Weren't You In Captain America?

However, when you've got your cast as Jones and Jackson, you're in pretty good hands.

Sometimes the dialogue or delivery seems a bit...off... maybe unnatural.  Not sure if it's just the way it was scripted, or maybe an attempt by either actor to bring the tiredness of the fight to their delivery... but those occasions aren't many.

Naturally, when it comes to believers and non-believers, nothing is going to get solved, and no minds are going to be changed by watching a movie.

The ending is ambiguous.

The only thing that is certain, White lived to see another day.  Whether or not his mind was changed or would he try to kill himself again...

?

Final Grade: B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor:  Not a purchase, but I could see watching it again a year or two  down the road.