Saturday, January 25, 2014

Someone Should Have Hijacked The Script To "Carjacked" And Made It Better


Carjacked (2011)
Rated R for Language, Violence and Stupidity

Starring Maria Bello, Stephen Dorff, Connor Hill

Directed by John Bonito

The Story:

A mom (Bello) is bringing her son (Hill)  home late one night.  She stops at a gas station for some food and gas, and her life is changed when a stranger (Dorff) in the backseat demands that she start driving, and nobody will get hurt.  Oh, but someone is going to get hurt.

You, the viewer.

:)

Oh my goodness.

Aside from the obvious foreshadowing and overemphasis on what a less than stellar mom Bello was, the movie started off decent enough.

It was going for B movie low-grade charm and thrills.

In fact, the interplay between Dorff, Bello and the kid at first wasn't bad.  There was almost a surreal charm to the whole affair.

It's All Downhill From Here



But then, the movie kept going, and it was as if the writers or director weren't sure where to go next.

So then, layers of absurdity and stupidity began getting piled onto the film.

At that point though, it was almost comical.

What would have/could have been a "B" movie, in spirit and in final grade, was literally slipping away before my eyes.

And it wasn't that I couldn't turn away because it was so bad it was good or anything.

At this point, I wanted to see what could they possibly do next to make matters worse.

Success!

Absurd Plot Moment # 17...

Nearly every five or ten minutes, this movie never failed to deliver another smack to the forehead.

I literally just chuckled as I counted down...B... B-...C+...C....

How low would it go?

Well, when the bad guy empties a gun into a car, doesn't move and gets hit by the car, that's pretty much throwing up the shoulders and giving up.

Career advice for Stephen Dorff: Do not make any more movies that take place within the confines of a motor vehicle (Brake).

Thank you.


Final Grade: D

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Only if you want to laugh, unintentionally, at an alleged "thriller".

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