If Only It Were The End... "X-Men: Apocalypse"

X-Men Apocalypse (2016) 

Rated PG-13

Starring James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Nicholas Hoult, Oscar Isaac, Rose Byrne, Evan Peters, Sophie Turner, Tye Sheridan, Lucas Till, Kodi Smit-McPhee, Ben Hardy, Alexandra Shipp, Olivia Munn,

Directed by Bryan Singer

The Story:

En Sabah Nur/Apocalypse (Isaac) was the first mutant, he stole his powers from others like him and made himself powerful and immortal. Buried for centuries in Egypt, he is awakened in the 20th century and begins to find his new horsemen, including Magneto (Fassbender), Storm (Shipp), Angel (Hardy) and Psylocke (Munn).  It's up to Professor Xavier (McAvoy), Mystique (Lawrence) and Beast (Hoult) to recruit and lead a new team of X-Men, including Jean Grey (Turner), Cyclops (Sheridan) and Nightcrawler (Smit-McPhee) into battle to save the world

Boring.

No wait, this is a superhero movie...

Super-boring!

The one exception: the Quicksilver (Peters) scene. That's amazing stuff, and I could watch that anytime. I wish they would have done that in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but oh well, too late now.

I'm not trying to pick on Fox and say that the X-Men should move back to Disney so that we can have one cohesive universe...

But if they're listening, they should.

:)

But at least, unlike the Fantastic Four, they've been moderately successful with the movies, especially after rebooting with First Class and Days of Future Past.

I'm not sure what went wrong but I found myself consistently indifferent to this movie.

I wanted to like it, but it seemed to be in a constant state of "there's so much going on, yet nothing's really happening!" for nearly 2 1/2 hours!

So much potential, and instead it's like watching a franchise tread water until they can get to the next movie.

I'm afraid I have to say it, but when I look back on how much I enjoyed this to just about any other film in the X-Men experience, I'm unimpressed.

Plus, take into account how much I love this genre, and what the Marvel Cinematic Universe is doing, so much like Batman vs. Superman, I have to grade accordingly...

Final Grade: D+

The Merc With The Movie..."Deadpool"

Deadpool (2016)

Rated R

Starring Ryan Reynolds, Morena Baccarin, T.J. Miller, Gina Carano, Leslie Uggams, Ed Skrein, Brianna Hildebrand, Stefan Kapicic

Directed by Tim Miller

The Story:

Wade Wilson (Reynolds) is a mercenary who winds up finding the girl of his dreams, Vanessa (Baccarin). When Wade is diagnosed with terminal cancer, he turns to a place that promises to cure his cancer, and give him amazing powers and abilities to go with his already formidable skills. It is here that Wade becomes the guinea pig for Ajax (Skrein) who manipulates him until Wade's latent mutant abilities are revealed. What kicks in is a healing power that pretty much makes immortal, he will heal from any injury, but the side effect is that his skin is not very easy on the eyes. With vengeance on his mind and Vanessa on his heart, Wade becomes the merc with a mouth that comic fans have loved for the past 25 years, and now the rest of the world is sharing in our joyous rapture...

Deadpool!

Yep, I finally got around to seeing the film.

I figured I would give the rest of a world a couple week head start, and that would also remove the amount of obnoxious fans chattering in the theater.

Worked like a charm.

So, obviously those that know me well enough know that Deadpool is easily my favorite character from the last 25 years, and rivals the likes of Cap, Spidey and Hawkeye as one of my favorites of all time.

Why? He's fun. He's funny. And oh so much more.

He is what you will see on the movie screen, brought to life straight from the comic page.

Reynolds was born to play the role, and it wasn't just by luck that he was cast. The writers of the comic even alluded to Reynolds being the face of Deadpool way back when, long before anyone ever dreamed of Mr. Wilson becoming a movie, let alone the most successful R rated movie, superhero or not, in the history of forever.

All while being done with the smallest superhero budget since Superman or Batman, 2 films that were both made in the 70s/80s.

Yes, an entire century ago!

They made it work with a great script, perfectly cast actors that believed in what they were doing, and believed in the concept of creating the perfect Deadpool movie.

This is easily Fox's best release of any superhero franchise they have the rights to.

Plus, if you saw my Facebook feed, or went on the internet at any point from December until the movie was released, you also bore witness to the genius of the Deadpool marketing team who made the best viral promotion of any movie, ever made.

Genius.

I salute you all!

However, is it the best superhero movie I've ever seen?

Yes...

And no.

IF you're going to make an R rated Deadpool movie, then this is what you're going to get.

COULD they have made this film into a PG-13 movie without watering it down too much?

Absolutely.

Tweak a few scenes slightly, then dial the language back a bit. Have Deadpool utter some nonsensical "Fluffy pink unicorns!" type profanity and that would allow the kids that have grown up seeing Deadpool in the comics and on all the animated Marvel cartoons (as well as all of the superhero toys) a chance to see Wade in action.

But they didn't, and that was their choice.

Will most kids see it anyway?

Absolutely.

My Facebook news feed was filled with stories from everyone who saw it during the opening week seeing lots of 8-10 year olds in the theaters with their parents.

Which tells me they didn't get the memo from Deadpool and Fox that sit this one out and wait until Civil War to take the kids to the movies.

Or, they really don't understand that an R rating should probably be viewed without kids at first, and then decide if you think your child can handle it.

So the knock on Deadpool is it will be a movie that I can't sit back and enjoy with my whole family, like Winter Soldier, Ant-Man, or Guardians of the Galaxy.

Fair enough.

They didn't set out to make a family friendly film, so I can't honestly knock them too hard for it.

I'll just take their + away.
;)

However, anyone that was able to convince their date that it would be a fun romantic comedy, I hope they succeeded because the love story shines through as the entire reason for the movie.

I hope the majority of the cast returns for the sequel(s).

Here's hoping that Deadpool is # 1 again this weekend after 3 straight weeks at the top of the Box Office.

Looks like that ban from China isn't as worrisome as originally feared.

:)

Final Grade: A

'Fantastic'? Not Even Close... "Fantastic Four"

Fantastic Four (2015)

Rated PG-13

Starring Miles Teller, Michael B. Jordan, Kate Mara, Jamie Bell, Toby Kebbell, Reg E. Cathey

Directed by Josh Trank

The Story:

Child genius Reed Richards (Teller) gets a scholarship to attend college so he can work on an experiment alongside Susan Storm (Mara) and Victor Von Doom (Kebbell). They get help from Johnny Storm (Jordan) when he has to pay off some debt to his father (Cathey). When the transporter shows that it works, the kids decide to send themselves to see what's on the other side. Reed invites his best friend, Ben Grimm (Bell) to tag along. When they arrive, things go horribly wrong, the teens are imbued with powers that change them into the team that would become...The Fantastic Four.

Oh. Dear. Heavens.

I believe this is a karmic payback for all who may have complained about the 2005 release of the Fantastic Four. That one is a cult classic at our house, we all loved it and shake our collective heads at the anger directed towards that film.  At least that movie got the majority of what made the Fantastic Four work, correct.

Evans and Chiklis made a dynamic duo of Torch and the Thing and much like the comics, that's my favorite part about the team.

Here, that banter and interplay is nonexistent and these characters are dull and uninteresting.

So too the dialogue.

Pedestrian acting by actors that can, and have, done better.

It's as if nobody wanted to be there, and for the audience, that relates to people that don't want to see the final effort.

Budget looking effects, a poor story where once again people feel the need to shoehorn Dr. Doom into the origin.

No.
No.
No!

He doesn't need to be there, and in fact, shouldn't be there.

And for heaven's sake, just put him in the armor and make him a despotic ruler of a small European country.

The Negative Zone. The Mole Man. ANYTHING but Doom at this point.

Or better yet, just give the rights back to Marvel and let them do things properly.

The Thing doesn't even wear shorts! How hard was putting CGI shorts on a model?

When Stan Lee won't do a cameo in your film, you need to realize: You're doing it wrong!

This is bad.

Not "oh my God, I can't watch" bad. Just wasted opportunity, and in the wave of amazing release after release from Marvel (and even Fox is finally on track with their X-Men franchise) this seems like a bargain basement offering for some small indie comic that should never have been made.

Not what you would expect, or deserve, from the comic that helped launch and keep Marvel Comics at the top for 60 years. 

Final Grade: D+  I'm feeling generous, and/or, bad for this franchise.   On second thought, the more I typed, the angrier I got about how they are failing us, and themselves with this franchise.

Revised Final Grade: F

It's About Time...Travel... "X-Men: Days of Future Past"

X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)

Rated PG-13

Starring Hugh Jackman, Ian McKellan, Patrick Stewart, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence

Directed by Bryan Singer

The Story:

The X-Men are being wiped out by the Sentinel program. To save themselves, Professor Xavier (Stewart) and Magneto (McKellan) join forces with the remaining X-Men, they run a risky gambit of sending Wolverine (Jackman) back in time to find Professor X (McAvoy) and Magneto (Fassbender) to try and stop Mystique (Lawrence) from making a huge mistake that will cause the creation of the Sentinels.

Confused?

Don't be.

It will all make sense before the whole thing is over.

And in the process, they build on the great work from X-Men: First Class and bring the entire X-Men franchise back to relevance and in direct competition with Marvel Studios.

Nothing like a bit of friendly competition.

If Marvel can't get their franchises all back under one roof (boooo), then I'd like to at least see them be successful and well made.

I was never really thrilled with any of the Wolverine or X-Men movies until First Class came along.

Now, with Days of Future Past, Fox resets the entire franchise and is able to go forward (or backward) and do anything they want.

Bravo, well played.


Fox better enjoy this while they can, because it is just about time for them to begin recasting all of the roles once again.

I'm not sure how many more turns in the claws Jackman has, but he's leaving some really big shoes to fill.

Good luck.

Final Grade: A-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Enjoyed it, bought it. One of the 10 Best of 2014. Looking forward to the next installment.

Now Playing..."X-Men: Days Of Future Past"

X-Men- Days of Future Past (2014)

Rated PG-13 for language, violence, and Hugh Jackman's bum

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender, Jennifer Lawrence, Peter Dinklage, Ellen Page,

Directed by Bryan Singer

The Story:

In the future, the war between humans and mutants is nearing its end.  What is left of the X-Men make one last stand.  If they can use Kitty Pryde's (Page) talents to send Wolverine (Jackman) back to 1973, he can avert the assassination of Dr. Bolivar Trask (Dinklage) by Mystique (Lawrence).  The government will capture Mystique and use her unique DNA to create the Sentinel program and use those weapons to wipe out mutant-kind.  Wolverine will need to reunite Xavier (McAvoy) and Magneto (Fassbender) to help him stop Mystique, and hopefully change the future.

Well, how about 20th Century Fox.

In one fell swoop, they fixed everything that was wrong with the X-Men/Wolverine franchise with a bit of a soft reset button.

All it took was a bit of time travel, and a willingness by the franchise to embrace the awesomeness of X-Men: First Class and move forward.

Initial reaction?

This is probably the best X-Men movie yet. 

I may have to watch First Class again just to make sure, but it was pretty darn good.

I was never that enamored with either of the first X-Men movies, and I didn't hate the 3rd nearly as much as every other human.

Totally disappointed with the first Wolverine solo movie, mostly for the total butchery of Deadpool.

:: sniff ::

But again,  one fell swoop, and everything can now be different.

The best parts of the movie:


1) Peter Maximoff/Quicksilver - Awesome. Hilarious.  Now that we've seen what the X-Men can do with him, let's see what Joss Whedon can do in The Avengers.

2) Blink - She was awesome, and short-lived (once upon a time) in the comics.  She was awesome in the film.

If you've abandoned the franchise at any point, come on back.  If you've never set foot in the franchise... you might get a little confused, but I think the plot is solid enough not to lose you too much, give it a try.

And yes, sit through the entire credits.  You'll be treated to a scene that does two things:

1) It sets up the next X-Men movie.
2) It answers an age old question about how something was made.

:)

And yeah, I still don't get people that get up and leave at the end of comic book films!

I felt bad for this one lady and her kids.  The husband/dad was growing impatient at having to sit and watch the credits roll.

As the credits just about finished, he told her "there's not anymore credits to put a scene into, let's go".

Jerk.

So they left, and were out of the theater just as the teaser played.

Ah well...

I think I'll have to give the X-Men the ranking of 2nd best comic-book movie of the year so far.

Moving ahead of Spider-Man 2, but trailing Captain America.

Let's see how the Guardians do in August.

Final Grade: A-/B+ range

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I'll be adding it to the X-Library this Christmas.

It's A Super Weekend...Part Two..."The Wolverine"

The Wolverine (2013)
Rated PG-13 for Violence and Language

Starring Hugh Jackman, Famke Janssen

Directed by James Mangold


The best there is at what he does...mostly.

The Story:

Wolverine/Logan (Jackman) has been in seclusion since last we saw him.  He is haunted by dreams of Jean Grey (Janssen) and longs to join her in death.  Lucky for him, Yashida (Hal Yamanouchi) has the resources to give Wolverine that peace, and repay a debt of gratitude from long ago.  Accompanied by Yukio (Rila Fukushima), they return to Japan where he meets Yashida's granddaughter Mariko (Tao Okamoto).  However, when Yashida dies and the Yakuza come gunning for Mariko, it's up to Wolverine to keep her safe.  However, there's one problem... his healing factor appears to be gone, so he's going to get hurt...badly... and may not survive what's coming next.

Ah, much better.

To be honest, I have seen the first 3 X-Men movies, and they get a collective "meh" from me.  Amazingly, I think Last Stand, the most reviled of the three, is my favorite.  It's the one that most approached the appeal of the comics.

Then there was X-Men Origins: Wolverine.

So much potential...  so poorly executed.

"Seriously?"

My biggest beef, you don't cast Ryan Reynolds as Deadpool, then sew his mouth shut. 

Stupid.
Stupid.
Stupid.

Of course, Fox knows they have a cash cow, they just have to keep cranking out these films to avoid having the rights going back to Disney where a proper X-Men film can be made.

"Do I Want To Be In Your Movie?  Let Me Think About That..."

Thankfully, they hit the reset button with X-Men: First Class, easily the best of the entire X-Franchise, and it seems like Fox was at least willing to try and treat the franchise with the respect and care that it deserves to at least try and compete with Marvel Studios for quality superhero movies.

Then the focus turns back to the star of the franchise, Wolverine.

How do they fare this time?

Better.

"That Plane Can't Be A Good Thing..."

Much, much better.

I absolutely loved the flashback to Logan's tenure in a prison camp during WWII, and how he creates his bond with Yashida.  It's very well done, and makes the comic and movie fan wish that the entire Marvel Universe was under one umbrella, because how cool would a WWII movie with Cap and Wolverine be?

Yeah... Pretty cool!













Then we have Wolverine's Japanese adventures, and aside from a few scenes that just seem slightly jarring in the manner in which they were filmed, overall, everything works.

What I wasn't a fan of...

Silver Samurai as a giant robotic suit.  I understand the why, it doesn't mean I have to like it.

Wolverine's claws.  Never a fan of the bone claws, and hopefully he'll have those things fixed by the next movie.  However, I understand that due to his age, he's had the adamantium claws for much less time than he's had them as bones.  Fair enough.

Which leads me to the closing credits...

Come on people, why do you keep getting out of your seats when a Marvel film from any studio is over?

"Even the God of Thunder and a World War II Super-Soldier Have Figured This Out"

 Would it kill you to sit still for an extra 3-5 minutes?

At worst, you acknowledge the hundreds of people that devoted hours to bringing you entertainment for 2 hours.

At best, you might see something pretty cool.

Looking forward to the next film.


Final Grade: Complaints aside, I'll give Wolverine a solid B.

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I'd happily give this one another viewing, and I'm sure it will find a spot in my library sooner, rather than later.