Whatever Happened To Spielbergian Aliens? "The 5th Wave"

The 5th Wave (2016)

Rated PG-13

Starring Chloe Grace Moretz, Nick Robinson, Zackary Arthur, Liev Schreiber, Maria Bello, Ron Livingston, Alex Roe,

Directed by J Blakeson

The Story:

The aliens have made contact, and after 4 waves (Darkness, Destruction, Disease and Invasion) it's time to unleash...The 5th Wave!
But after so much destruction, what could possibly come next?

Cassie (Moretz) is desperate to find her brother (Arthur) who she lost when the Army came to round up survivors and take them to a training facility. There, Colonel Vosch (Schreiber) plans on training the young kids to be the soldiers of the future that can find and destroy the enemy. They shall be...

The 5th Wave!

So, now we know what the 5th Wave is.

How is it as a movie?

Meh, not bad.

It takes the trappings of the dystopian future and places a young female lead into the center of the conflict.

Her quest to reunite and rescue her little brother are the driving force behind the movie, and whether she helps save the world or not is only secondary.

Filled with an ensemble of fine characters to supplement that story, it's nothing earth-shattering and reinventing the sci-fi / action / dystopian future genre...

But entertaining nonetheless.

Probably nothing you haven't seen in one shape or form already, but it's done with enough gusto this go round, you won't feel like you wasted your time.

Final Grade:  C+

There Are Worse Times To Be Had... "Grown Ups 2"

Grown Ups 2 (2013)

PG-13 for language

Starring Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Chris Rock, David Spade, Salma Hayek, Maya Rudolph, Maria Bello

Directed by Dennis Dugan

The Story:

Lenny (Sandler) decided that he enjoyed visiting home so much a few years back, that's the place to move the wife (Hayek) and kids.  They can grow up around friends and family and maybe have a bit of normalcy.  However, with a small town full of friends and former rivals, how normal can things really be?

Okay, let's be fair.

The first Grown Ups was a pretty cute movie overall.  Nothing ground-breaking or earth-shattering, but it was funny enough and I had a good time watching it, and so did most of the family.

Picked it up when Blockbuster was going out of business, and I have no regrets.

I'm a fan of Adam Sandler, and for the most part, I enjoy more of his movies than I dislike.

Now, with Grown Ups 2, that family-friendly aspect, which was questionable at best before, gets pushed slightly beyond acceptable this time around.

Blame the inclusion of Nick Swardson.

Or Dan Patrick's skimpy shorts.

: /

Swardson has his moments...in other movies... but lately whatever I've seen him in, he's becoming more cringeworthy with every performance.

However this film does not deserve the label of "worst movie ever" or "worst" anything label.

It's simply another typical effort from Sandler that aims for the lowest common denominator for the jokes.

And yes, for every groan-inducing cringe, there are some justifiably funny moments throughout the film.

Why, there's even a bit of a heart-felt message in the final act as old rivalries are ended and some relationships are rekindled.

So again, while not great, it's also not an abomination of film.

Final Grade: C

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I don't see this one joining the original in the library.

How Far Would You Go? "Prisoners"

Prisoners (2013)
Rated R for language and violence

Starring Hugh Jackman, Jake Gyllenhaal, Terrence Howard, Maria Bello, Viola Davis, Paul Dano

Directed by Denis Villeneuve

The Story:

On Thanksgiving, the Dover (Jackman and Bello) and Birch (Howard and Davis) families get together to celebrate.  As the day wears on, the little girls ask to go back over to the Dover household to get something.  The parents agree, and the girls leave.  Later, the parents ask the oldest son where the girls are, and he hasn't seen them.  Apparently he did not walk the girls back home like the parents assumed.  They frantically look around the neighborhood and contact the police about an RV that was seen in the neighborhood with some creepy guy (Dano) hanging out inside of it.  Detective Loki (Gyllenhaal) takes the lead on the case, but when the girls are not immediately found, Dover decides to take matters into his own hands.

How far would you go to...what would you do... to find and protect your little ones?

This is a very dark film that ratchets up the tension with each passing moment.

The movie runs almost 2 1/2 hours, but amazingly doesn't really ever drag and feel like it.

Everyone does a fantastic job in their roles.

Jackman's descent into madness as he tries to keep his sanity and trying to not cross any lines permanently is the driving force of the film.

Gyllenhaal grows nicely into his role as a detective who knows the dad is onto something, as well as up to something but remains half a step behind.

The ending of the film...

I think it varies between everyone who has watched the movie.

I'll leave it for you to decide.

Final Grade: Solid B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Too dark and too intense to make for an enjoyable rewatching experience.

Someone Should Have Hijacked The Script To "Carjacked" And Made It Better

Carjacked (2011)
Rated R for Language, Violence and Stupidity

Starring Maria Bello, Stephen Dorff, Connor Hill

Directed by John Bonito

The Story:

A mom (Bello) is bringing her son (Hill)  home late one night.  She stops at a gas station for some food and gas, and her life is changed when a stranger (Dorff) in the backseat demands that she start driving, and nobody will get hurt.  Oh, but someone is going to get hurt.

You, the viewer.

:)

Oh my goodness.

Aside from the obvious foreshadowing and overemphasis on what a less than stellar mom Bello was, the movie started off decent enough.

It was going for B movie low-grade charm and thrills.

In fact, the interplay between Dorff, Bello and the kid at first wasn't bad.  There was almost a surreal charm to the whole affair.

It's All Downhill From Here

But then, the movie kept going, and it was as if the writers or director weren't sure where to go next.

So then, layers of absurdity and stupidity began getting piled onto the film.

At that point though, it was almost comical.

What would have/could have been a "B" movie, in spirit and in final grade, was literally slipping away before my eyes.

And it wasn't that I couldn't turn away because it was so bad it was good or anything.

At this point, I wanted to see what could they possibly do next to make matters worse.

Success!

Absurd Plot Moment # 17...

Nearly every five or ten minutes, this movie never failed to deliver another smack to the forehead.

I literally just chuckled as I counted down...B... B-...C+...C....

How low would it go?

Well, when the bad guy empties a gun into a car, doesn't move and gets hit by the car, that's pretty much throwing up the shoulders and giving up.

Career advice for Stephen Dorff: Do not make any more movies that take place within the confines of a motor vehicle (Brake).

Thank you.


Final Grade: D

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Only if you want to laugh, unintentionally, at an alleged "thriller".

Corruption In Detroit? Time For An "Assault On Precinct 13"

Assault on Precinct 13 (2005)
Rated R - Violence & Language

Starring: Ethan Hawke, Laurence Fishburne, Gabriel Byrne

Directed by: Jean-Francois Richet


The Story:

It's New Year's Eve and a Detroit police station is going to close its doors one final time.  Sgt Roenick (Hawke) and a skeleton crew of police are holding down the fort when a prison transport carrying notorious mob boss Marion Bishop (Fishburne) arrives seeking shelter from a snowstorm.  Things go from bad to worse when the station is besieged by vigilantes looking to take out Bishop.  Imagine Roenick's surprise when he learns that those killers outside are actually cops, looking to take out Bishop before he can testify that there are dirty cops in Detroit!

Where's RoboCop when we need him??!!

"At Least They Aren't Remaking This Classic!"

I apologize, I've never seen the original version written & directed by John Carpenter from the 70s, so I am unable to compare and contrast the two films.

How Dare You Not Watch Our Version!

That said, I've watched this film on two different occasions.

I've enjoyed the film both times.

It's tightly scripted, well-acted by an impressive cast that also includes Brian Dennehy, John Leguizamo and Maria Bello.

Someday I Will Voice An Animated Sloth And Become More Famous Than All Of You!!

It's a thriller that ratchets up the suspense with each passing moment.  The only hope the precinct has of survival is to arm the prisoners and work together to stay alive.

Of course, cops and robbers don't exactly trust each other, so it's an uneasy alliance at best.

Add to that the layer of intrigue by having the cops as the ones on the outside attempting to kill everyone inside, and you've got a pretty gripping tale.

It's a B movie that doesn't attempt to do anything but entertain the audience and tell a decent story.

On that note, it succeeds brilliantly.


Final Grade:  B

Would I Watch It Again?  Yes, it's entertaining and clips by at a decent pace.

Would I Purchase It?  I've had it on my wish list for almost a decade now.  Perhaps someday I will pull the trigger?

Deja Vu Review... "Payback"

Even thieves have principles.

At least some of them.

The Story:

Our hero, Porter (Mel Gibson) is a crook, but one with principles.  He goes in on a job, and expects his fair share of the take.  Unfortunately, he's double crossed by his partner (Gregg Henry), shot and left for dead.  However, Porter doesn't die that easily, and with the help of an old flame (Maria Bello), Porter is going to take down the syndicate, some crooked cops and get back what is rightfully his.

Does it sound familiar?

Sounds an awful lot like yesterday's review,  "Parker"...

That's because both are based on the same character by the same author.

And yes, the reviews are eerily similar! : )

Mel Gibson makes a great turn as the guy who simply wants what is entitled to him.  He doesn't really care who he has to beat, shoot or kill to get it, all he wants is his fair share.

Nothing more...nothing less.

In fact, it's the paltry amount that is a running gag throughout the film, that Porter would risk his neck for so little reward is unfathomable to the bad guys that Porter is barking his way up the chain to find.

It's also here where Payback holds the edge over Parker: the supporting cast.  Whereas Parker didn't have one, Payback has David Paymer, William DeVane, Lucy Liu, Kris Kristofferson and the late, great James Coburn.

I understand many people can no longer watch or support Mel because of what he said/did a few years ago.

I am not one of those people, as everyone makes mistakes... some larger than others.  Some more in the public eye than others.

Grain of salt... and it's not my place to judge.

Except on whether or not I enjoyed the movies.

: )

Final Grade: B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: While not one that immediately springs to mind when I want to watch a Mel Gibson movie, one I can definitely watch, and I believe I already own it.