That Was Something All Right... "Suburbicon"

Suburbicon (2017)

Rated R

Starring Matt Damon, Julianne Moore, Oscar Isaac

Directed by George Clooney

The Story:

Things begin to get sinister in an all-white neighborhood in the 50s when the first black family moves in.

George Clooney directs this satire about suburbia... or was it race relations... was it the ideals of the 50s...

What was it exactly?

It was hot garbage, that's what.

Ejected after 20 excruciatingly long, unfunny, and most damning, uninteresting minutes.

Didn't care what was going to happen to the cast or how the movie turned out.

Now that we all know I'm using the Star System in 2019, welcome to the first actual ZERO star review of the year.

Reality TV..."Money Monster"

Money Monster (2016)

Rated R

Starring George Clooney, Julia Roberts, Jack O'Connell

Directed by Jodie Foster

The Story:

Lee Gates (Clooney) is a charismatic financial adviser with his own high profile cable show. His producer (Roberts) is getting ready to leave after the show is over, when a man (O'Connell) sneaks into the studio and pulls out a gun. Suddenly this live show takes a decidedly darker turn and viewers are stunned as they watch Gates work to get out of this situation alive.

Overall, this was a pretty effective dramatic thriller.

It unfolds pretty much in "real time" as the show descends from what was planned to an unexpected hostage situation.

Clooney and Roberts work extremely well together, though their chemistry is a bit dampened by the fact that they don't share the screen with each other, they communicate through an earpiece.

Clooney gets a chance to run the gamut of emotions, though he seemingly is almost too cool at times, considering the danger he is actually facing.

That's probably the one thing that is mostly lacking from this film, is that actual sense of an edge that the gunman might snap and kill everyone.

We know he's not going to kill Clooney, so much of the dramatic tension is false.

You sucker yourself in as the audience to buy into the dread and despair of the situation, but you're well aware that killing the star of the movie makes for a pretty lousy movie, so you have to pretend something bad could happen to stay in the right frame of mind.

That's just my take on it though.

Not a bad effort, but could have ratcheted things up a notch or two to make this even better.

Final Grade: B-

Be Bored By Those Thrilling Days Of Yesteryear..."Hail, Caesar!"

Hail, Caesar! 

Rated PG-13

Starring Josh Brolin, George Clooney, Channing Tatum, Scarlett Johannson, Jonah Hill, Frances McDormand, Tilda Swinton,

Written and Directed by Joel & Ethan Coen

The Story:

Eddie Mannix (Brolin) is a "fixer" for Capitol Pictures in Hollywood in the 1950s. He makes problems for the stars...go away... As he is dealing with a usual day at the office, one of their biggest stars, Baird Whitlock (Clooney) goes missing.

This is not the fun, farcical tone that the movie trailer suggested. It's a dramedy, to be sure, but if you're expecting a comedy, expect to be disappointed.

If you're expecting a movie with Clooney as the focus, also prepare to be disappointed.

Neither of these issues really bothered me.

If you're expecting a good movie, prepare to possibly be disappointed.

And that is the camp that I fall into.

This loving look back at Hollywood in the 1950s lacks really...everything.

The stars are present.
The scenery is magnificent.

You will believe the 1950s live again!

But really...nothing happens, and everything happens, all in the span of about a day.

A really long day, but you get the idea.

Ah, but it's a Coen Brothers film, so it's probably not about Hollywood at all, but is an allegorical tale about Christianity.

Oh.

Well that changes everything.

Except the part about it being a good movie.

B-O-R-I-N-G.

I do believe I made it through the whole thing, all the while wondering if there was a point to any part of it.

Weeks later, I don't believe I can look back and find the point.

I would have preferred a movie that focused more on Mannix, and maybe less sideshow stories and make a bigger case or two for him to try and solve.

As it was, it just seemed like a whole lot of loose ends that are vaguely tied together by his role.

But, I will award points for the look of the film.

And a reminder that if you want a better film about 1950s Hollywood, do yourself a favor and watch Trumbo instead.

Final Grade:  D+

The Future's So Bright..."Tomorrowland"

Tomorrowland (2015)

Rated

Starring George Clooney, Britt Robertson, Raffey Cassidy, Hugh Laurie,

Directed by Brad Bird

The Story:

There's a place called Tomorrowland where genius inventors are invited to try and shape a better future for the world. Nix (Laurie) brings these geniuses to this other world, and a young inventor named Frank gets invited by Nix's daughter, Athena (Cassidy). Years later, Casey (Robertson) begins seeing visions of Tomorrowland and tracks down Frank (Clooney) to help her find it. The only problem, Frank doesn't want to go back, and the citizens of Tomorrowland want them both dead!

So much potential.

I'm not sure what exactly happened, as Brad Bird is normally gold when he directs (and writes) the movies.

I'm going to go out on a limb with a regular finger-pointing on this matter:

It's too long.

Otherwise, it's filled with some pretty interesting bits, and some great actors who seemed to be having a great time with the film.

The story really picks up once Casey and Frank team up and attempt to get back to Tomorrowland.

The energy and the story seems to ramp up quite a bit at that point.

The problem is, there are too many less interesting bits holding this altogether, and by the time Clooney makes his "official" entrance, the movie seems half over, and nothing has truly happened.

Snipping about 10 to 20 minutes or so from some of the buildup might have streamlined the overall narrative.

There were good intentions to be found here, and the overall message and idea behind the film are solid.

It simply stumbles in the execution.

Final Grade: C+

Yule Like It A Little Bit..."A Very Murray Christmas"

A Very Murray Christmas (2015)

TV-MA

Starring Bill Murray, Paul Shaffer, Amy Poehler, George Clooney, Julie White, Miley Cyrus, Chris Rock

Directed by Sofia Coppola

The Story:

Bill Murray is set to host a live Christmas special in New York on Christmas Eve as a giant blizzard descends on the city. Paul Shaffer is there to provide the musical support, but Murray is ready to cancel since none of the guests can make it. His producers (Poehler and White) insist that the show must go on. However when the power goes out, Murray is off the hook and spends the evening with an eclectic set of hotel guests and staff.

Remember the old Christmas variety specials from seemingly decades gone by?

This is an homage/send-up of those very same shows, done for the pleasure of Bill Murray.

He helped write it and sets the tone for an odd evening, to be sure.

While Cyrus will get the most attention likely for her actually reserved and nice performance, it's Maya Rudolph who kills with vocals in the special.

It's then a tie for who makes their musical number funnier:

George Clooney or Chris Rock ?

Clooney's bit makes the song work, Chris Rock is in the funniest part of the entire special.

Worth a viewing, especially for fans of Murray.

Doubtful I'll need to rewatch this special every year around this time.

Your mileage will likely vary.

Final Grade: C+

The Race To Recover History..."The Monuments Men"

The Monuments Men (2014)
Rated PG-13 for language and violence

Starring: George Clooney, Matt Damon, John Goodman, Bill Murray, Cate Blanchett, Jean Dujardin, Hugh Bonneville, Bob Balaban

Directed by George Clooney

The Story:

Frank Stokes (Clooney) convinces FDR that finding all of the stolen art that the Nazis have made disappear across Europe is a noble pursuit.  Allowing him to assemble his own team, Frank recruits some of the finest art historians of the time and asks them to go in harm's way in search of thousands of years worth of world history.  They will mostly succeed, but there will be casualties along the way.

But of course, it is based on a true story.

This is an odd duck of a story.

The truth behind the assignment should have been more than enough to make this movie work.

And yet...

As noted by the trailer, much humor is attempted to be infused into the situations.

Some of the jokes work better than others.

Essentially, the team splinters into 1 or 2 man teams in search of clues to the whereabouts of thousands of missing paintinings, sculptures and other works of art.

As the war draws to a close, the team reunites to get to the large cache of art before the Nazis can destroy it all.

For the most part, the team succeeds.

They also recount the more famous finding: the millions of gold bars also hidden in the mines.

Everyone in the cast does a fine job.  Some characters seem less fleshed out than others.  You can probably figure out which characters are more likely to not survive the war than their counterparts.

It was good.

It should have been better.

Final Grade: Going with a B-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I wanted to like this one more than I did, and add it to the World War II library of films.  Maybe someday, but no real hurry.

The End Is Nigh... "Batman & Robin"

Batman & Robin (1997)

Rated PG-13 for language, violence and ice skating

Starring George Clooney, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chris O' Donnell, Uma Thurman, Alicia Silverstone

Directed by Joel Schumacher

The Story:

Batman (Clooney) and Robin (O'Donnell) are facing the maniacal Mr. Freeze (Schwarzenegger) who is trying to get his hands on diamonds, to create a freeze ray that will turn the world to ice!  He has a hand in the creation of Poison Ivy (Thurman) who uses her feminine ways to drive a wedge between the dynamic duo!  Thankfully, the arrival of Alfred's niece, Barbara (Silverstone) will tip the scales to the side of justice when she becomes...Batgirl!

Oh my...

This was even worse than I remembered.

When the Dynamic Duo become ice skaters in the opening battle of the film, I literally rolled my eyes and checked out of the film.

Which is a shame, because George Clooney gets the lion's share of unfair blame on the failure of this movie.

It wasn't his fault. 

In fact, I have gone on record, many times, that Clooney actually made the best Batman of the 3 that wore the cape and cowl up to that point.

No, it was the terrible script and Schumacher instilling too much camp in a series that had been only wink and nod in that area up to that point.

Final Grade: D+ realm

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Nope, I'm good.

You Will Appreciate The "Gravity" Of Their Situation

Gravity (2013)

Rated PG-13 for language and space peril

Starring Sandra Bullock, George Clooney, Ed Harris

Directed and written by Alfonso Cuaron

The Story:

Dr. Ryan Stone (Bullock) is on her first shuttle mission.  Teamed with veteran mission commander Matt Kowalsky (Clooney) everything is going fine until they are warned by Mission Control (Harris) that there is debris heading towards the shuttle and they need to abort their mission and get clear of the debris.  Before they can, the debris tears through their area, killing everyone except Stone and Kowalsky.  Adrift and alone, can the two survive in outer space and find a way to get back home?

Well, yes and no.

This is a pretty good little dramatic thriller.

The movie is pretty much all Sandra Bullock's and she does admirably as the astronaut who is in over her head.

Saved by her commander, she has one shot at getting home alive, but it's going to be a very perilous journey.

Think Apollo 13, but not real life, and much fewer actors.

Clooney's role is much smaller than you would imagine, but he does a great job with playing George Clooney.

:)

Beautifully shot, I have no problem with this film winning the Best Director award at the Oscars.

Otherwise, it's an engaging 90 minutes worthy of your time.

Final Grade: B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I could watch it again in the future, but no need to own it, and no hurry to rewatch.  Maybe in a few years.