"Mother!" May I Turn This Off?

Mother! (2017)

Rated R

Starring Jennifer Lawrence, Javier Bardem, Ed Harris, Michelle Pfeiffer,

Written and Directed by Darren Aronofsky

The Story:

A writer (Bardem) and his wife (Lawrence) live alone in an old house that is painstakingly being restored in a beautiful field. One night a stranger (Harris) arrives at the doorstep. A huge fan, the two converse through the night, and then the stranger's wife (Pfeiffer) shows up. Chaos ensues as the house and their life plunge into chaos. The worse things get for them, the more inspired He becomes to write his next work.

And if you have 2 hours of your life you're willing to part with for this painful allegory to The Bible, you can subject yourself to Darren Aronofsky's latest Hollywood offering.

It would be less painful to ask 30 people to slap you across the face with an oversized King James Version of The Bible.

Bad.

Bad all around.

Any movie where a character watches paint dry, well, that joke just writes itself...

Horrible writing, an impressive ensemble cast that just makes you cringe with every scene you are subjected to.

A running time that feels 3x longer than it really is.

Perhaps the single most painful movie I've watched from beginning to end in my entire life.

I was tempted to eject the film, but for 2018, I'm trying to be a kinder, gentler movie critic, and give it a chance to redeem itself past the 20 minute mark.

Boy, am I stupid.

:)

It will have other movies join it on the Worst Movies of 2018 list, but I can't see any movie overtaking it as THE Worst movie I'm going to see.

Avoid at all costs.

Final Grade: F-