A Disney Princess By Any Other Name... "Moana"

Moana (2016)

Rated PG

Starring Auli'i Cravahlo, Dwayne Johnson, Rachel House, Temuera Morrison, Jermaine Clement,

Directed by Ron Clements, Don Hall, John Musker, Chris Williams

The Story:

Moana (Cravahlo) is the daughter of the Chief (Morrison) but dreams of a life beyond their island's reef. With fish becoming scarce, she wants to lead their people to new and exciting places, but is landlocked by her father and their tribe's ideals. When she discovers an ancient artifact, she sets out to find the demigod Maui (Johnson) and restore life to the dying sea.

It's the Disney Princess for the 21st century. She doesn't need a man to help save her...

No, wait.

Even the movie acknowledges Moana as the latest in a long line of Princesses:

"Okay, first, I am not a princess. I'm the daughter of the chief."

"Same difference."

"No."

"If you wear a dress, and have an animal sidekick, you're a princess."

Yep, she's a Princess all right!

I guess what they are really going for is that she doesn't need a love interest, and that's fine.

There's no room in this coming of age story for a romance, anyway.

The movie itself is fairly fun, if predictable.

The problem with Disney, and the Disney Princess genre if you will, is they have often set themselves bars that are difficult for subsequent movies to hurdle.

Place this one side by side with Tangled, and sorry, Moana doesn't stand a chance.

However, I look at this against Frozen, and I still wonder what people ever saw in that movie.

Different strokes for different folks.

It had its moments, and the bonding between Moana and Maui were indeed the strengths of the film.

But when you add in the deus ex machina of the ocean seemingly as a third character that tossed in save whenever it was needed...

Well, why didn't the ocean just take Moana straight to the end of her mission?

I know, lessons to learn and all that growing up stuff and redeeming Maui.

It's enjoyable enough, mostly harmless, and Jermaine Clement is awesome, and woefully underused as the villain.

Glad I saw it, but won't be rushing out to buy it or anything like that.


 Final Grade: B-

What A "Tangled" Web We Weave Today!

Tangled (2010)

Rated PG

Starring Mandy Moore, Zachary Levi, Donna Murphy

Directed by Nathan Greno

The Story:

Rapunzel (Moore) is a princess with magical healing powers in her hair.  Kidnapped from her parents by Mother Gothel (Murphy), she lives alone, isolated in a tower.  Every year she sees a magnificent displays of light, unaware that it is her parents releasing thousands of balloons into the sky in the hopes that she will return.  When scoundrel Flynn Rider (Levi) makes his escape from the castle and is looking for a place to hide, he stumbles upon Rapunzel and reluctantly agrees to take her back to see the lights.  It's an adventure of a lifetime for the both of them.

This is a good princess movie.

Great voice actors.

Great storyline.

Great characters.

Fun songs from the returning Alan Menken.

Everything that Frozen was not.

:)

Why it got the love and not this film, I'll never understand.

Especially considering how much of this film seems to have been lifted and transplanted into Frozen.

This is one with well-placed musical numbers throughout the film, balancing out the story with musical numbers.

The dynamic between Flynn and Max provides a great hero/villain then buddy/action tale.

The love story is natural and not forced.

Even the rebellious nature of Rapunzel against her 'mother' was filled with conflict and remorse.
Yeah...

I don't get why this one wasn't better received.

It was, and is, clearly the superior film.

The one complaint I heard about this film was how the portrayal of the "witch" was an indictment against adopted parents...



Wow, talk about looking to get offended.

She. Stole. Rapunzel.

Didn't adopt.
Stole.

Her real parents never lost hope that they would get their loved one back.

In fact, it's one of the rare Disney instances where the parents aren't evil, stupid, or killed.

:) 

Final Grade: A-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Own it, and it's a great one.

I Refuse To Drink The "Frozen" Kool-Aid

Frozen (2013)

Rated PG

Starring: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel, Johnathan Groff, Josh Gad, Santino Fontana

Directed by  Jennifer Lee

The Story:

Elsa (Menzel) has the power to turn things to ice with her touch.  When she accidentally hurts her sister Anna (Bell), her parents forbid the two from seeing each other again.  Anna is heartbroken, wondering what she did to lose her sister.  When Elsa's powers rage out of control, she escapes the kingdom to live alone and never hurt anyone again.  She doesn't realize that her powers left her kingdom under a blizzard, so Anna and Kristoff (Groff) set off to find her and turn the blizzard off.

I wanted to like this film, I honestly did.

I didn't.

I take my Disney film seriously, and this movie let me down on so many levels.

While I didn't hate it, and believe me, I came really close, I would consider this one of Disney's most contrived, clichéd entries in ages.

That the entire world thinks this is the greatest Disney film of a generation, makes me weep for our future.

Plus it wins an Academy Award for best animated film and best song?

So much wrong...

Where do I begin?

The musical aspect...

The songs are hackneyed and overdone, bursting into song way too frequently in the first 1/2 of the movie, then going silent through the end.  Poor pacing for a musical.  Also lacking much of the fun, depth and beauty of the Alan Menken scores.

"Let It Go" belongs in a Disney film or a broadway production.

Not on Top 40 radio.

Every hour.

Gratingly out of place, it makes me dislike this movie even more every time I hear it play.

Think "My Heart Will Go On" from Celine Dion/Titanic.

Yeah, it's like that.

The characters...

Which ones WEREN'T directly lifted and remodeled after Tangled?

And not just the people...

The horses in the kingdom were direct copies of Maximus.

Sven, the reindeer, got Max's personality aspect, though severely dumbed down.

Olaf (Gad) the snowman?

Terrible! One of the worst "funny sidekick" characters I've had to endure in all of Disney-dom.

He walks around throughout the film and his delivery makes him sound drunk, or high, throughout the entire film.  Eesh.

The Romance...

Hello, poorly contrived, out of left-field.

Kristoff, if anything, would have been smitten with Elsa, not Anna.

This was a complete cop-out and just smacked of a last ditch effort to give Anna a happy ending.

Well, Anna should never have agreed to marry Hans, or Disney never should have pulled a 180 on his character after such a short and shoe-horned introduction.

Think about it:  How did Hans know he was in the presence of Princess Anna?  Nobody had ever seen her outside of the castle.

Contrived!

There was a good story somewhere in the source material to be had.

This was not it.

Final Grade: I lean towards C-... but then I just want to Let It Go...

D+ and eligible for Turkey of the Year!

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I won't buy it and I definitely won't watch it again.