Familiar Yet Different... "Gridlocked"

Gridlocked (2015)

Starring Dominic Purcell, Cody Hackman, Stephen Lang, Vinnie Jones, Danny Glover, Trish Stratus, Richard Gunn, Steve Byers,

Directed by Allan Ungar

The Story:

SWAT leader David Hendrix (Purcell) is recovering from being wounded in the line of duty. Officials team him with troubled movie star Brody Walker (Hackman) as part of some court-ordered rehabilitation. However, their ride-along is short-lived as a visit to Hendrix's crew is interrupted by some bad guys attempting to infiltrate where the SWAT team hangs out. Can the skeleton crew outlast the assault, or are they all doomed to fail?

Nothing too terribly ground-breaking to this one.

We've all seen the movies where the cops are assaulted by an outside force that has somehow gotten the edge on how to get in.

Is someone on the team a turncoat?

Well, there is the new guy, and of course that seems suspicious...

With the addition of the cocky movie star, he provides a wrinkle to the story, and some much needed comic relief throughout.

A little longer than it needed to be, and some clunky narrative and dialogue throughout, it's not a horrible B-movie, but one that lacks any redeeming charm to make it a cult favorite or a repeat viewing.

Purcell comes out of this one quite nicely. He's got the look for Hollywood action films, but seems to be doing just fine on television with a return to Prison Break and his role on Legends of Tomorrow, which I really need to start watching when it arrives on Netflix.

:)

Final Grade: C

A Romantic Comedy WIth No Romance? "You May Not Kiss The Bride"

You May Not Kiss The Bride (2011)
Rated PG 13 for language and violence

Starring Dave Annable, Katharine McPhee

The Story:

Bryan (Annable) is a pet photographer who accidentally injures a cat that belongs to the wife of a Croatian crime boss (Ken Davitian).  Well, perfect timing because he is having troubles getting his daughter Masha (McPhee) citizenship.  So he tells Bryan he must marry her and then divorce her in a year so she can marry Brick (Vinnie Jones), his right hand man.  Oh, he also better keep his hands off his daughter as well.

Another gem dug up through Netflix!

I try and sort through the romantic comedies periodically to find something that is suitable for a date night or fun for the whole family.

I offer to let them watch horror films with me, but no takers thus far.

So this was the next one that Netflix said was the most enjoyed by the fans, so I gave it a whirl.

I was not disappointed.

Even better: Neither was anyone else in the house! 

Win-win!

Not watching a whole lot of television, I was not too familiar with either of the leads.

So...We're Married Now...

No, all of the names (or faces) took all of the smaller roles.

Mena Suvari is Bryan's assistant who becomes obsessed with him once he announces he's not interested in her.
Kathy Bates kills it, too briefly, as Bryan's mother.
Then there's Tia Carrere who doesn't look a day older than when I last saw her in True Lies (1994!).  Playing her cousin, Rob Schneider in probably his most subdued comic role ever.

Jungle Fun For The Whole Family

Lots of other familiar faces sprinkled throughout.

It's a cute little movie, and I'm glad we saw it.

Final Grade: B

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I see this one being added to the library before too long...

Verily, E'en Shakespeare Wouldst Approveth..."She's The Man"

She's The Man (2006)
Rated PG-13 for language

Starring Amanda Bynes, Channing Tatum,
Directed by Andy Fickman

Written By William Shakespeare.  Sort of.

Return to those thrilling days of yesterday when Amanda Bynes hadn't lost her mind yet...


The Story:

If you've read Shakespeare's Twelfth Night, get ready to see it turned on its ear.  If you haven't, you're about to get the general idea of the play, but with a modern twist.  Viola (Bynes) is a girl soccer player whose school cuts girls soccer!  She wants to join the boys team, but they reject the idea of a female playing with the guys.  So she hatches a plan to take her twin brother Sebastian's (James Kirk) place at a rival school.  She dudes up and ends up rooming with Duke (Tatum).  Naturally, a love triangle ensues because Duke has eyes for Olivia Laura Ramsey) but she won't give him the time of day...she's got eyes only for Sebastian (Bynes!) and Sebastian ... Viola... is totally falling for Duke!

Let the madcappery ensue!

This movie is flat out funny, from start to finish.

Wisely, they take the basic premise of Shakespeare's work, and keep that, but jettison the language with the update to the modern setting.

No offense, but every Shakespeare update that goes modern age, yet keeps the language never works for me.

But, update the work, keep the ideas/plot/characters... it seems to work.

It may just be me, but that's my story, and I'm sticking to it!

Must Look Away From the Tatum!

Yes, I watch this movie, and then I just sit back and sigh.

So much potential from Ms. Bynes, and it seems to go off the rails into a trainwreck of life.

Thankfully, we'll always have the movies.

All of the supporting characters are great character actors who support the story perfectly.  Vinnie Jones is great as the soccer coach who brings Sebastian up to the main team by watching the effort put forth by a former second stringer.

I Could Kill You With Me Bare 'ands...

David Cross is hilarious as Gold, the absent minded headmaster, and really, the movie is just filled with comedic gems from start to finish.

The cast and writers make Shakespeare's comedy of identity swap work wonderfully on so many levels.

The fun revelation of course, is Channing Tatum.  This is before he was Channing Tatum!  It's his first co-starring role, as Step Up was on the horizon when this came out.

But Tatum is hilarious as the jock who Viola pines for, and his sense of comedic timing is exceptional.

Channing Tatum: Tampon Spokesman

The kid's got a future in Hollywood.

:)

Good for a laugh any, and every, time it hits the DVD player.

Final Grade: A

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I would say this gets played at least once a year in the house, and I do own it.

Not Another Review of "Not Another Not Another Movie"!

Does a parody of a parody movie turn out to be true cinematic art?

Think about that for a moment...


The Story:

After their last movie sank at the Box Office, the studio boss comes looking for their money back.  To try and salvage their career and save themselves from getting killed, they hatch a scheme to make fun of movies that make fun of movies.

Ingenious, right?

Well...

To say that your biggest names in a production are Burt Reynolds and Chevy Chase, you would be talking box office gold...

In 1977.

In 2013?  Not so much...

And those two have probably 5 minutes of screen time, enjoyed their paycheck, and went home.  Vinnie Jones comes in to do the heavy lifting with about 10 minutes of screen time, and the rest is filled with a bunch of no-named faces who stretch an idea into a 90 minute film.

And they succeed.

To be honest, it wasn't that great, but it also wasn't the train wreck it could've been.

Sticking around after the credits, it appears that this film was edited using computer software, so I'm all for any advancement in film that lets the next generation of filmmakers get a foot in the door.

There are some funny gags, some humorous moments and it is all wrapped up with a bow at the end of the film.

Can't say two enthusiastic thumbs up, but I've sat through worse (or more correctly, I've shut off worse, see last year's # 1 worst movie of the year that had a similar premise!)

Streaming on Netflix as of this writing.

Final Grade: C-