These "Bears" Could Use Some Foraging Advice From Yogi

Bears (2014)

Rated G

Narrated by John C. Reilly

Directed by Alastaire Fothergill and Keith Scholey

The Story:

In the latest DisneyNature documentary, John C. Reilly narrates the adventures of an Alaskan brown bear over the course of a year as she protects and raises her two newborn cubs.

If you've seen any of the other DisneyNature documentaries, you know what to expect.

Reilly does his best narrating a story with gorgeous scenery, but many of the lines fall flat, or deliver eye-rolling groans of "who writes this stuff?"

However, they're making these for the kids, so I guess you have to take what you're given.

The film chronicles the life of Skye, the mother bear as she raises her two cubs Scout and Amber.  She must work hard to keep the cubs alive and safe from other bears who would like nothing better than eating her babies for a snack while they wait for the salmon to arrive.

The scenery is nothing short of amazing.

At a little over an hour, it's not too taxing on you either.


Final Grade: C, maybe a C+ on a good day.

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: I'd have to pass on watching this one again. Cute once, but that was plenty.

A John Cusack Kind Of Weekend: "The Frozen Ground"

The Frozen Ground (2013)
Rated R for language and violence

Starring Nicolas Cage, John Cusack, Vanessa Hudgens

Directed by Scott Walker

The Story:

Alaskan State Trooper Jack Holcombe (Cage) has been on the hunt for a notorious serial killer.  Robert Hansen (Cusack) seems like a stand-up guy in the community, but someone is abducting young girls, torturing them, and then leaving them for dead out in the wilderness.  When Cyndy Paulsen (Hudgens) escapes, this is the first break that the troopers have in catching their man.  However, Cyndy is hardly reliable, and Hansen's been covering his tracks for decades.

Naturally, based on a true story.

Cage reins his usual out-there self in with this role, and plays a no-nonsense trooper ready to head to the Lower 48, but wanting to close out this last case before he goes. 

Cusack is effectively creepy and sadistic, playing completely against type as a man with a deep, dark secret.

It's a slow build that's definitely moody and atmospheric.

Given the wild terrain and abilities of pilots, it's no wonder Hansen was able to pull off his treachery.

The conclusion of the film is worth it, and this winds up being a touching tribute to the ladies that were lost to this filth.

Available to stream instantly on Netflix as of this writing.

Final Grade: B-

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: Once was good.  Creepy, but good.

The World Gets A Bit Dangerous "Walking With Dinosaurs"

Walking With Dinosaurs (2013)

Rated PG for scary dinosaurs

Starring Charlie Rowe, Karl Urban, Angourie Rice, John Leguizamo, Justin Long, Skyler Stone, Tiya Sircar

Directed by Barry Cook & Neil Nightingale

The Story:

In Alaska, an archaeologist (Urban) is driving his niece (Rice) and nephew (Rowe) to a site where he had found a dinosaur tooth.  Unimpressed, the nephew decides to sit at the truck and pout, when a bird named Alex (Leguizamo) comes along to tell the kid about the story about how that tooth came to be found where it was.  Cue the flashbacks and the story of a little dinosaur (Long) who grows up to be the leader of his herd though unlikely odds.

So apparently the brains behind this thought, let's take the BBC series Walking With Dinosaurs , and cross it with The Land Before Time...

Yes, these dinosaurs talk, though they don't do mouth movements, so it's not nearly as cutesy or annoying as you might think.

I don't know what to think...

The movie itself is nice to look at.  Using actual scenery with CGI, the landscapes and backgrounds are lush and beautiful.

However, I'm not sure how impressed I was overall with the dinosaurs.

Maybe it was the inclusion of humans in Jurassic Park, but I almost think those dinosaurs looked more realistic.

Anyway, the story itself isn't that terrible, and it's a film that the whole family can sit and enjoy/tolerate for 90 minutes, then it's done.

Final Grade: C

Rewatchability/Purchase Factor: No, I think I'm okay.