"The Brothers Grimsby" Is Downright Painful

The Brothers Grimsby 

Rated R

Starring Sacha Baron Cohen, Mark Strong, Rebel Wilson, Isla Fisher,

Directed by Louis Leterier

The Story:

Nobby (Cohen) and his little brother Sebastian (Strong) were orphaned growing up, and separated by adoption. Nobby has always been waiting to find his long lost brother, and when the two are finally reunited, he actually blows Sebastian's cover as a top MI6 agent, and now Sebastian is wanted for murder. The brothers have to stay alive and clear their names before their reunion is short-lived.

You know those trailers where you think you probably saw all the good parts already?

Well, if you saw the trailer for The Brothers Grimsby, you were pretty much correct.

As this was my first Sacha Baron Cohen movie, I cannot compare it against his previous offerings to decide if this is along the same lines as those films.

It's enough to make me realize that I'm not Cohen's target audience though.

There are glimpses of a smart, Bond-style parody, and getting Leterier to direct an action-comedy was likely a wise choice.

However, the few smart gags that happen are surrounded by a dozen crude jokes with little or no humourous value in them, whatsoever.

Which is a shame, because it wastes a pretty good cast.

That Isla Fisher chose this over Now You See Me 2, time to fire your agent.

And Mark Strong tries to save the movie by being just plain awesome, but it's too little, too late.

I can't, in any good consciousness, recommend this movie.

I will give it bonus points for thankfully being shorter than most movies.

Do yourself a favor, and go watch Kingsman instead.

Final Grade: D+

Inside Is A Good Movie Just Trying To Get Out..."Term Life"

Term Life (2016)

Rated R

Starring Vince Vaughn, Hailee Steinfeld, Bill Paxton, Jonathan Banks, Jordi Molla, Terrence Howard, Jon Favreau, Mike Epps,

Directed by Peter Billingsley

The Story:

Nick (Vaughn) is a planner. He does the research on how to pull off the perfect crime, then sells that information for a price, and everybody wins. Except this time, when the people that bought the plan are murdered, Nick finds himself on the run from the police and the mob.  And the worst part, they're coming after Nick's daughter (Steinfeld) so he has to try and protect her and stay one step ahead of everyone else at the same time.

On paper, this probably looked and sounded amazing.

Well, I suppose it really did, as apparently it started off as a graphic novel before it was adapted into a movie.

:)

But something is fundamentally amiss in the film, and it's hard to know exactly what's not clicking.

It seems to center mostly on the story itself, or at least the actions of the characters as the story unfolds.

There should be tension and energy that just doesn't come through on the screen, but on occasion, you get a glimmer of the thriller/heist this film wanted to be.

Good, not great.

That seems to sum up a lot of movies lately.

It's an amazing cast, many of whom are onscreen for but a moment, their talents kind of wasting away in the roles they were given.

And the less we say about Vince Vaughn's hair in this film, the better.

:)

Final Grade:  C

"Krampus" Knows If You've Been Naughty...And Will Make You Regret It!

Krampus (2015)

Rated PG-13

Starring Adam Scott, Toni Collette, Emjay Anthony, Stefania LaVie Owen, David Koechner

Directed by Michael Dougherty

The Story:

Max (Anthony) and his family (Scott, Collette & Owen) have become disillusioned this holiday season. So that means, Krampus has decided to visit the family and rekindle their holiday spirit, even if it kills them!

I've seen a lot of good horror comedies so far this year.

Heck, I have a couple that will be vying for favorite movie of the year honors when all is said and done.

Krampus won't be joining that list.

The main problem, as I saw it, the movie tried too hard to be scary and forgot to be funny.

And then they tried too hard to be funny and would forget to be scary.

So you take a good cast and give them a film with an uneven tone, and the results will be average, at best.

So yes, there's a few good laughs, and a few good scares.

But when it's over, much like the ending, it will be a vague exercise in trying to remember what exactly you just saw.

Final Grade:  C

A Night Over 30 Years In The Making..."Huey Lewis & The News"

So, I'll let you all in on a little secret:

Huey Lewis & The News is my favorite band of all time.

So there you have it, you now know 2 people who admit to that fact (Marty McFly was the other).

When I flipped the radio from country to Top 40 Pop/Rock around 1982/1983, it was just before the debut of Sports.

Needless to say, over the next few years, I wore that cassette out listening to the entire album, not a bad track to be found. A few years later, Fore! came out, and same thing, amazing album from first song to last, and that cassette too was eventually destroyed by constant use.

:)

And much like all musical acts of the 80s, the 90s came, introduced the world to Grunge music, and all of my favorite artists disappeared and became relics of a bygone era.

Thankfully, people realize there was some pretty good music put out in that decade and most of those songs are standard issue on Adult Contemporary stations.

Many of those musical acts reunite now as a nostalgia acts to the amazement of the crowds.

Yet Huey Lewis & The News never stopped working during that time.

They continued to put out material, and while it never really caught on with the changing musical taste of each new generation, their longtime fans bought it, loved it, and continued to sell out his concert tours every summer.

So, about the time I watched Live Aid, little me vowed to someday see Huey Lewis & The News in concert.

Little did I know that journey would take about 30 more years than I expected!

: /

I always wanted to see Huey when I was in Maryland. He came to Wolftrap across the river in Virginia every year, but the timing never worked out right.

Then for the decade plus that I was stuck in South Carolina, I never found him any closer than 4 hours from home, and that just wasn't going to work.

I was amused that seemingly every year he did play a venue or two in Oregon...

Which brings us back to now.

His summer tour was announced, and he was playing two sites: the amphitheater in Bend or a Casino on the way to the Coast.

While I wanted to take everyone to Bend, because I raised a whole family of Huey Lewis & The News fans, that was going to be pricey.

So instead, I bought two tickets to the show at the casino, 21 and older only, and watched as the show quickly sold out.

I won't mention how horrible the website was for purchasing tickets as I saw the 2 front row center seats in my cart vanish...and by the time I was able to get the cart to function correctly, I was now about 20 rows back...

Or maybe I will mention it! :)

Then we were hushed about it.

Because whenever we make plans in the future or for something remotely fun, life or annoying people always seem to arrive unannounced at the last minute and ruin it.

Thankfully, not this time.

So as we sit in our seats waiting, the show is about to begin...

And a very familiar heartbeat begins...

The Heart of Rock & Roll starts playing and we jumped to our feet, as did several people throughout the sold out concert as we clapped, sang and danced along.

That was followed by She's Some Kind of Wonderful, and then went into I Want A New Drug.

Now, you know those songs...

Played live, are those quiet, slow tempo songs you should sit on your hands and listen to?

No.

But apparently for the crowd of old fogeys behind us, they kept poking my wife and me and telling us to sit down.

They even pushed our chairs into the back of our legs.

I turned around mid-song and one lady asked me "How's the show? I wouldn't know because I can't see it."

Apparently she didn't notice the two jumbo screens in front, or two big screens to the side that she could have looked at.

Or, horror of all horrors...actually stood up and enjoyed the show herself.

I shrugged my shoulders, smiled, and went back to clapping and standing, soaking in the moment.

This was a bucket list item for me.

See Huey Lewis & The News LIVE IN CONCERT!!!

Mission accomplished!

And they did not disappoint.

It was an amazing set full of hit after hit after hit!

Huey has an easy rapport with the crowd, telling us he knows we want to hear something new, but too bad, he's in charge, and he's in a hit-singing mood.

Eventually he did indeed give us 2 new songs that night, and they seamlessly fit in with the rest of his catalog.

Slowly, as the concert wore on, others finally unable to ignore the infectious energy of the band and those of us in the crowd who know a good thing when they see it, rose to their feet and really seemed to bring the entire energy level up in the place.

Aside from some sticks that never get out of the mud, by the time it came to cheer for an encore, that place was rocking.

And gracious Huey came back to the stage and played us 3 more songs.

When it was all over, you know there were some hits that just don't make it out due to time limits, but you feel like you've had the best night of your life.

Would I do it again?

In a heartbeat.

I got to see Huey Lewis & The News in concert, and I was able to take my beautiful bride with me!

The only downside, all of the kids at home who wanted to go, but were age restricted.

So if we do it again next year, I'm probably going for the venue that doesn't restrict by age.

And we'll be there.

And we'll be standing.

Cheering.

Singing.

Clapping.

Dancing.

You've been warned.

Buy your tickets accordingly.

:)


Final Grade: A+

They Saved The Last For Last..."Allegiant"

Allegiant (2016)

Rated PG-13

Starring Shailene Woodley, Theo James, Miles Teller, Naomi Watts, Jeff Daniels, Octavia Spencer,

Directed by Robert Schwentke

The Story:

Tris (Woodley), 4 (James) and their crew decide to leave the walled city of Chicago and see what truly lies on the other side. There they meet David (Daniels) who claims that Tris is the key to rebuilding the future. But can he be trusted?

At this point, can anyone in this franchise be trusted.

So, I've stuck with the franchise this long, you feel you might as well finish with it, am I right?

Well, judging by the box office, about half of the fans abandoned ship this go round.

Possible reasons?

Well for starters, Allegiant does not rhyme with Divergent or Insurgent. Clearly the pattern was broken, and people may have mistakenly thought this was a brand new Dystopian Future movie.

;)

More likely, people are simply tiring of the Young Adult books brought to cinematic life after all of the Hunger Games, this series, the Maze Runner and a few other films as well.

These aren't superhero movies. These are films about depressing futures.

Oh, so maybe they are just like DC superhero movies. ;)

Either way, perhaps the audience is growing tired of that genre.

Or perhaps they are simply getting tired of a storyline that seems just a bit padded at this point.

Because, quite frankly, it seems like the same thing that happened in the last movie happens in the next movie.

They escape the ruthless clutches of a power-mad leader, only to watch as all of the factions begin fighting amongst themsleves to see who becomes the new power-mad leader.

So the franchise is treading water.

And when you bring in less than 100 million dollars from your previous film, the 4th film in the franchise, 4th!!?? gets changed on the schedule from a next summer in theaters to a next year on tv as a springboard for a new TV show.

Good luck with that.

So on that note, I bid this series farewell.

Final Grade: C

I Wanna Fly Like "Eddie The Eagle"

Eddie the Eagle (2016)

Rated PG-13

Starring Taron Egerton, Hugh Jackman,

Directed by

The Story:

Eddie Edwards (Egerton) is actually a pretty good British skier, but when he fails to make the Olympic team, he checks the rules and realizes that the British downhill jumping ski requirements are very lax, and exploits that loophole to become the team.

This is the story that, alongside the Jamaican bobsled team, made the 1988 Calgary Winter Olympics likely the greatest Olympics in modern history.

Or at least the one with the best "feel good" moments from watching that I can remember.

While the backstory of Eddie gets Hollywood-ized, such as the invention of a coach (Jackman) that didn't really exist, the feel-good nature of Eddie's tale comes through strongly.

The real sad take away from this film is that the British, along with most other countries, have changed the rulebooks so much, they have taken away the opportunity for anyone not entrenched in the Olympic money machine to ever replicate Eddie's journey and even get the chance to compete in the Olympics.

And that's a shame, because while America, or at least journalists reporting from the Olympics, are at least obsessed with the medal count, it's the human stories that touch most viewers.

And you don't need to dig to find how this child was raised in 13 broken homes to reach our heartstrings, it's the passion and joy from the athletes that make us gravitate towards liking them.


Final Grade:  B

Possibly The Greatest "Race" In History

Race (2015)

Rated PG-13

Starring Stephan James, Jason Sudeikis, Jeremy Irons, William Hurt, Carice van Houten, Barnaby Metschurat, Eli Goree, Shanice Benton,

Directed by Stephen Hopkins

The Story:

Jesse Owens (James) heads to Ohio State, becomes a track legend under the tutelage of coach Larry Snyder (Sudeikis) and eventually becomes the Olympic hero that everyone remembers.

The time has come to tell his story, finally.

Why it took 80 years to get to the big screen is beyond me, but with the cooperation of Jesse's family, it's finally here.

Naturally, some things are going to be compressed for time, changed for dramatic emphasis, but the nuts and bolts of the story are all the same.

The pressure faced by the Olympic committee to even go to Germany in 1936 is presented.

So too is the pressure Owens himself faced, told by the NAACP to sit out the games as a protest.

I'd like to think that history has made that symbolic gesture seem pointless, as normally the only way to confront a bully is to look him square in the eye, and then punch him square in the face.

Owens did that, and more.

James is great as Owens, bringing to life one of America's greatest Olympic legends.

And he is presented, warts and all, and not lifted up as something other than a normal man, who just happened to be really, really fast.

The real revelation is Sudeikis playing a non-comedic role.

He gets a great chance to shine, and his scenes with James bring their chemistry to life.

Also of note, Germany filmed the games for the documentary Olympia, and that storyline also unfolds in this movie, and much of what they brought to that production is the backbone of televising modern sporting events.

Final Grade: Solid B