Houston, We Don't Have A Problem..."Captain Marvel"

Captain Marvel (2019)

Rated PG-13

Starring Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson, Ben Mendelsohn, Jude Law, Annette Benning,

Directed by Anna Boden & Ryan Fleck

The Story:

Vers (Larson) is a warrior of the Kree civilization who has been having recurring nightmares with flashes of a life she doesn't remember. When she is captured by Talos (Mendelsohn) an enemy Skrull, he helps unlock the secrets locked inside her and sets her on a collision course with Earth that will reveal everything that she cannot seem to remember.

Welcome to Part 21, Year 11.

Never in anyone's wildest dreams, except maybe Kevin Feige's, did anyone dream that when Iron Man was released in 2008 that this is where we would be.

Find me another studio that has enjoyed the success that Marvel Studios has enjoyed with the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Seriously.

I'll wait.

James Bond has had 25 films over a 50 year span. Some of the efforts have been good...some not so much.

Maybe the closest you could find would be the Disney animated films, which have taken decades to create over 21 beloved movies.

Even Pixar stumbled on their impressive early track record with the Cars franchise.

Someday, the audiences that have watched the Marvel Cinematic Universe will be able to look back and marvel (pun fully intended) at the actors and directors that brought this to life and be impressed by what they managed to pull off and string together.

21 down, 2 more to go this year, and judging by the previews, those will do just fine as well.

They resonate with critics and audiences alike.

However, with Captain Marvel, there seemed to be a larger disconnect, at least in cyberspace, between those that enjoyed it, and those that seemingly hated the movie.

I don't get the hate.

I don't know if I didn't enjoy Captain Marvel as much as I should have, because the whole time a voice in the back of my head was wondering, "what is everyone else complaining about"?

Shame on me for that.

I left the theater with my lovely date, and said, "okay, tell me about all of the plot holes you found and how much you didn't enjoy this one."

To my surprise, she said this was one of the better MCU films that she has seen and she was very impressed.

I'm a lucky guy, right?

So there you go.

About as spoiler-free of a review as you're going to get.

You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll see Stan Lee in perhaps his greatest and most logical cameo ever!

Now, let's see her help save the day in Avengers: Endgame!

It's Watchable... "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword"

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword (2017)

Rated PG-13

Starring Charlie Hunnam, Jude Law, Djimon Hounsou, Eric Bana, Aiden Gillen,

Directed by Guy Ritchie

The Story:

Arthur (Hunnan) is a bit of a rogue, but when fate finds him next to the blade Excalibur, it turns out he is also the long lost true heir to the throne. That doesn't please Vortigern (Law) in the least, and he attempts to kill Arthur and any who stand with him.

Well, this is certainly a different take on the legend of King Arthur.

Ritchie does his best to keep the story moving forward, and surrounds the film with a talented cast who keep your interest.

There are a few mystical aspects that just seem odd as the film unfolds, but it gives Arthur the reason to rise up and be a true hero.

As 2017 was filled with at least 2 versions of the story, if you're going to watch one, make it this one.

Personally, I'd say go find Disney's The Sword in the Stone instead, but maybe that's just bias.

Or maybe, it's just that much better than most incarnations that have come since.

Possibly both.

:)

Final Grade: C

I "Spy" With My Little Eye...A Movie That Should Have Been Better

Spy (2015)

Rated R

Starring Melissa McCarthy, Jason Statham, Jude Law, Rose Byrne, Allison Janney

Written and Directed by Paul Feig


The Story:

CIA Operative Bradley Fine (Law) is killed in the line of duty. His analyst, Susan (McCarthy) is suddenly the best option to become a field agent, much to the dismay of their boss (Janney) and their other best spy (Statham). But Susan does her best to take all of her training into the field and watch their target (Byrne) and simply gather intel. However, when she makes contact, all bets are off and she may be the next spy to fall.

What a wonderful idea.

What a great cast.

What a horrible f*$%ing script.

I'm growing very tired of Paul Feig, or Hollywood, McCarthy or whoever thinks that funny equals f-bombs carpet bombing the movie in place of genuinely funny dialogue.

McCarthy's sarcastic put upon character is wearing thin on me, and you'll understand if I have reservations on the upcoming Ghostbusters reboot with Feig in charge.

Don't get me wrong, I think Unaccompanied Minors is one of the best Christmas movies made in the last decade and is an underappreciated masterpiece of comedy.

However, as underrated as that was, that's how overrated Bridesmaids was.

The Heat was mediocre, and this is a step down from that.

Maybe if Feig takes the f-word out of his arsenal, he'll be able to harness humor again, maybe not.

As the movie wore on, the repetition of the language was simply dragging the film down quick, and it was ejected at home.

I did finish watching the movie later, and there are humorous bits throughout, mostly thanks to Statham, but it was much too little, too late at that point.

I'm sure there's a sequel in the works already, but if it's going to be more of the same, I'm dreading it already.

Final Grade: C-

The Real Review... "Rise of the Guardians"

 

Okay, now that I had my April Fool's Joke yesterday, let's bring you the REAL review today...

 

 

The only thing that can stop the Boogeyman...

The Story:

The Guardians watch over the children of the world.  North (Alec Baldwin) is the guardian of wonder.  E. Aster Bunnymund (Hugh Jackman) is the guardian of hope.  The Sandman is the guardian of dreams.  And the Tooth Fairy (Isla Fisher) is the guardian of memories.  When all of this is threatened by Pitch (Jude Law) who is attempting to destroy all of childhood's hopes, dreams and wonders.... can the addition of perpetual mischief-maker Jack Frost (Chris Pine) tip the scales in favor of good, or is humanity doomed?

After months of tears and begging, I finally gave in and watched the movie.

It was everything that my kids swore to me, and more.

Much darker than Wreck-It Ralph, that doesn't mean there isn't a sweet side to this story.

It's fun, but not "funny", so the two films are on entirely different spectrums of animated entertainment.

You want fast visuals and fart jokes? Wreck-It Ralph is for you.

You want something deeper for yourself as a parent and for your kids to gather, then this is that film.

The animation from Dreamworks is superb, as always.  The voice acting is stellar, again you never lose sight of the character onscreen due to the voice of the actor in a stunt-casting role.

In fact, Alec Baldwin is all but unrecognizable as North enlisting a jovial Russian/German hybrid for his Santa.

I can see why many people could be turned off by the darkness of this film, but you're wrong.

It was a well-made film, and a shame that we have a generation of kids (and adults) that may not be able to appreciate that.

My only complaint with the film?

Whoever decided to end the film with THAT musical interlude...  I don't care what your intentions were, and from what I read, the idea behind it was sweet....

But that was just plain awful.

Maybe that's where DreamWorks went wrong?  You walk out of the theater, and the song over the credits is your last feeling, and if you walk out to that, you're not feeling it.

Final Grade: A.  You missed out on the + due to the musical choice.

Would I Own It: Already done!  The kids were suitably impressed.